Thinkwriter

Word Magic

2009-11-29T10:07:00.013-06:00

We each have a singularly unique way of seeing the world (see "Which window is yours?"),though only a few of us will ever take the opportunity to identify, or be able to fully grasp, our own perspective. This is because a person’s exclusive worldview is never personally obvious and even when discovered, is seldom accepted without argument.

The best way to begin “seeing” one’s own worldview is to understand the deeper meaning of one’s very first memory. No matter how brief or cryptic a person’s earliest recollection may seem to be, a treasure of information is always concealed. Every word and every phrase has importance.

As an example, J.K. Rowling’s brief early memory gives us her worldview.

My most vivid memory of childhood is my father sitting and reading The Wind in the Willows to me. I had the measles at the time, but I don’t really remember that. I just remember the book.

Rowling recalls a specific incident in which her father sits and reads The Wind in the Willows to her when she is sick with the measles. Interestingly, she uses 5 of the mere 37 words in the memory to point out that she doesn’t “really remember [having the measles].” Her mention of this so-called “non-remembrance” suggests its greater significance to the memory’s overall meaning.

Perhaps you can recall being carried away by the words of a magnificent story read with expression by a caring family member or teacher when you were a child. As for me, I remember hearing the story of Robinson Crusoe read by our fourth grade teacher. For a few minutes everyday, and until the book came to its inevitable end, I became one with Robinson Crusoe’s adventure. Nothing else really mattered. All my fourth grade worries seemed to disappear.

Unlike Rowling, however, my specific experience of enjoying the adventures of Robinson Crusoe is prompted by Rowling memory and therefore does not hold the same importance for me as Rowling’s memory does for her. This difference is important.

When asked about an earliest memory, Rowling names a moment in time when the words of The Wind in the Willows, as read by her father, transport her from the discomfort of the present moment to a world of mysticism, adventure, morality, and camaraderie. Unconsciously, she makes special note of this experience, thereafter bringing the recollection to mind innumerable times over her lifetime. We know this to be true, because without rehearsal, memories just fade away. Thus, from the millions of early childhood moments she might have recalled, Rowling is able to name this one incident as "most vivid."

Of interest is that Rowling began writing the first book in the Harry Potter series in 1990, when her mother was suffering with multiple sclerosis. Her mother died in December of that year. According to Rowling, “I was writing Harry Potter at the moment my mother died. I had never told her about Harry Potter.”

In 1992, Rowling married a Portuguese television journalist and the couple had one child the next year, after which they separated in December 1993. According to reports, Rowling was diagnosed with clinical depression and contemplated suicide that same year.

In 1995, Rowling finished the first Harry Potter fantasy novel, Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone (1997), while surviving on welfare. Initially rejected by twelve publishing houses, the manuscript was eventually published by Bloomsbury, a small publishing house in London, England.

In the U.S., Scholastic Inc. won the rights to publish the novel and changed the title to Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone (1998). Six wildly successful Harry Potter novels followed, leading Harry Potter to become a global brand worth over 15 billion dollars.

Thus, with a worldview of words make the world bigger, Rowling continued recording her imagination via words on paper, suggesting to us the utility and magic of writing in her life. In childhood, an occurrence of the measles was made insignificant by the words of The Wind in the Willows, and as an adult, putting her own creativity on paper distracted her from the reality of many painful situations, including her mother’s illness, her own divorce, her depression, and living on welfare, among others.

Moreover, by creating the Harry Potter series, Rowling has given millions of children (and adults) an avenue by which to alter their own consciousness, in addition to the fact that she has enriched her own life and lifestyle beyond measure. Yes, words have made her world demonstrably bigger.

Incidentally, how big is your world?

Rowling Out the Truth

2009-11-08T07:05:00.024-06:00

Joanne Murray, or J.K. Rowling as she is known the world over, was born Joanne “Jo” Rowling on July 31, 1965, in Gloucestershire, England. Celebrated for creating the wildly popular Harry Potter series, Rowling is also well-known for inspiring kids to read, for winning innumerable book awards, and for charming the media with such an incredible rags-to-riches story that Forbes named her the first person to become a U.S. dollar billionaire by writing books!

Thinkwriter is delighted to present what J.K. Rowling describes as her “most vivid memory of childhood.” What follows is that memory, in Rowling’s own words.

My most vivid memory of childhood is my father sitting and reading The Wind in the Willows to me. I had the measles at the time, but I don’t really remember that. I just remember the book.

In light of the truth that a single memory illuminates a person’s worldview in the same way a single blood sample reveals a person's health status, what does J.K. Rowling’s early memory suggest to you about her worldview?

Please review the following four possibilities and make your selection by voting in the poll to the right. To share your thoughts, please leave a comment at the end of the post, even anonymously if you wish. As always, thank you for participating!

1. The wind is invisible.

2. Words make the world bigger.(correct answer)

3. Creativity is contagious.

4. There's a fly in the soup.

Paul Harvey: Page Two

2009-08-26T20:33:00.020-05:00

Was there ever a time when listening to a Paul Harvey broadcast that you felt disapproving or offended?

Probably not.

To the contrary, Paul Harvey delighted listeners with a staccato delivery of unique news items and obscure historical vignettes. A failed painter turned out to be Adolf Hitler; the 13-year-old boy who got a cash gift from Franklin Roosevelt turned out to be Fidel Castro, and on and on – a formulaic program agenda that never disappointed. Bottom line: Harvey told stories under the guise of giving the news (i.e., “Stand by for news!”).

And his unique and strategically placed ads had a believability seldom found in high-end, more sophisticated commercials. As we waited for “the rest of the story,” Harvey convincingly touted any one of his apparently favorite products, including ocular nutrition, a favorite sound system, or even a preventative for osteoporosis!

Yes, the real story of Paul Harvey is that every time he hit the airwaves, he was able to pull together a focused audience before shrewdly interrupting himself to hype a personally endorsed product. He knew listeners would attend to his pitch in anticipation of what was to come after the commercial: a guaranteed surprise ending. No wonder so many marketers lined up to vie for his winning endorsements!

Hello Americans, I’m Paul Harvey. You know what the news is, in a minute; you’re going to hear . . . the rest of the story.

Of course, this strategy made Paul Harvey incredibly successful. His annual income was said to be in excess of the earnings of Barbara Walters, Walter Cronkite, and Mike Wallace put together. He loved great products, great ideas, and great men, surrounding himself over the years with all three, included among them such interesting characters as Warren Buffet, Sam Walton, and Billy Graham – all big thinkers, just like he was.

Keep this in mind as you reread his earliest memories. Paul Harvey’s worldview, via his earliest recollections, is easy to decipher once we look behind the curtain of the so-called “obvious answer.”

Each of his earliest memories happens to be a vignette of good versus bad behavior. For example, in memory one, Paul Harvey recalls smoking grapevine, only to receive the punishment of a mouthful of ants. In memory two, he crudely attempts to grab the attention of a girl, only to send her home crying. In memory three, he apparently has been a good student and thus receives the reward of his teacher’s approval, complete with an affectionate kiss on the top of his head! And finally, in memory four, he protects his ass, literally, and gets rewarded by his mother – who spends a relative fortune on his new clothes.

Through his memories, we realize that Paul Harvey saw life through a lens of good and bad behavior. Although history suggests Harvey’s world got less black and white over the years – his worldview, as evidenced in his early memories, suggests man is basically good. If you doubt it, listen again to Paul Harvey’s stories and find all the evidence you can handle.

Paul Harvey: Page One

2009-07-03T16:41:00.017-05:00

Paul Harvey, the renowned broadcaster with the captivating delivery and the cleverly pitched commercial, has shared a few of his earliest memories with the public over the years.

As you may recall if you've visited Thinkwriter in the past, when we have access to a person’s earliest memory or memories, we have the perfect window through which to recognize this person's worldview. With training, practice, and an experienced understanding about earliest memories, we are able to know and to quickly understand much more about a person than we could otherwise.

Let us now review Paul Harvey’s earliest memories.

1.) I remember once smoking grapevine behind the garage and getting a mouthful of ants.

2.) I remember my first crush. I was 7. Hoping to be noticed, I snapped a rubber band against the neck of poor little Ethel Mae Hazelton. She ran home crying.

3.) I remember my first kiss. It came from a teacher. I remember I was 7; she must have been 100. I forget what I had done thus to be rewarded because I was so flustered when she kissed me. She kissed me right on top of the head – when there was hair there. Instantly, I was in love forever.

4.) I remember during the Depression getting down to one wearable pair of pants. I discovered in class one day that the seat of my pants had finally worn through. I was excused from class early. Embarrassed, I walked home sideways down Main Street. I got angry about my situation when I spotted a chauffeur driven automobile transporting one of the oil barons of the city. I felt sorry for myself and jealous of a man I had never met. When I arrived home I showed my mother the hole. She took me to downtown Bell’s clothing store where she purchased a new suit of clothes that came with two pair of pants. It cost eleven dollars and ninety-five cents. (I later learned she had taken the money from the account she set aside for paying taxes.)

To begin to recognize Paul Harvey’s authentic worldview, look first for the commonalities in his recollections. A person's eariest memories always share a similar drumbeat. After a careful review, select Paul Harvery's worldview from the list to follow. Vote your best choice in the poll to the right.

Stay tuned and in the next few days, I will post his worldview and a commentary to explain the answer.

As always, thank you for participating! (poll now closed; correct answer in red)

1. Man is basically good.
2. I’m the king of attention.
3. Try not to show your ass.
4. Love makes the world go round.

Coming Soon...

2009-07-01T21:28:00.005-05:00

Earliest memories from Paul Harvey are coming soon to Thinkwriter.

Please stay tuned.

Robert Wagner: Director of Attention

2009-06-07T08:40:00.018-05:00

How interesting that it takes Robert Wagner 27 years to discuss the night his wife Natalie Wood apparently falls overboard and drowns off the coast of Santa Catalina near Los Angeles.

According to the story, after a night of drunken partying with actor Christopher Walken on the couple’s yacht, tensions between Wagner and Walken explode. Wagner, already jealous of Walken, a rising star, suspects Walken and his wife are having an “emotional affair” on the set of Brainstorm, the film Walken and Natalie Wood are shooting. Wagner loses his temper when Walken suggests Wood should star in more films instead of caring for two young children. Wagner smashes a bottle of wine on the table, forcing Walken to retreat to his cabin.

Wagner says he later puts his head around the door of his cabin to see Natalie getting ready for bed, after which Walken and Wagner return to the deck to try to cool down. When Wagner retires to his cabin around midnight, his wife is missing. Also missing is the yacht’s dinghy.

Wagner’s theory is that Natalie hears the dinghy banging loosely against the Splendor and goes out to fix it. He suggests she slips on the swim step, knocks herself unconscious and rolls into the water. The dinghy just floats away.

It is widely reported that Wagner blames himself for Natalie’s death and never completely recovers.

And so what about Wagner’s earliest memories?

Not unlike Wagner’s intention to confront an alleged competitor Christopher Walken, Wagner’s earliest recollections reveal Wagner’s ongoing quest to best his seminal rival, Robert J. Wagner, Sr. In four of his memories, we observe the father-son struggle for authority. In one memory, we learn what Wagner's idea of success and authority looks like.

In memory #1 Wagner ridicules his father’s response to Wagner’s accidental act of “blowing out all the outlets in the house.” As if to say “Sure, I blew out every outlet in the house; but Dad blew his cool,” Wagner explains “[Dad] came ‘roaring’ out, ‘grabbed’ me, ‘put me over his knee,’ and spanked me with a hair brush …and then ‘threw me off his lap’ for this ‘terrible thing’ I had done!” In Wagner’s telling of the event, his father is made to look the fool.

In memory #2, Wagner expresses disgust at being tagged “his father’s little package.” When the train transporting Wagner to California leaves the station, Wagner “rips off” a handwritten destination tag attached to his jacket, thereby declaring independence from his dad and signaling he will not be “[mis]handled” by the man who pays a paltry $10.00 to assure his son’s safe “delivery” to California.

In memory #3, Wagner’s challenge is more passive. According to Wagner, his father opens a checking account so Wagner can pay his expenses on the trip to California. In visiting a souvenir shop along the way, however, Wagner uses money to buy an antique gun; with the justification he wants protection from “marauding Indians” who might attack the train. Wagner’s purchase is guaranteed to provoke anger in his dad, especially considering the gun is in all probability not an antique, most likely overpriced, and useless for protection purposes. Wagner challenges his father by spending money the way he chooses to spend it.

In memory 4, Wagner recalls the moment he realizes his picture of success and authority. Watching Gable, Astaire, Scott, and Grant walk together down the fairway, Wagner decides exactly what he wants in life: to be one of them - handsome, successful, respected, and in demand.

Finally, in memory #5, Wagner shoots out all the lights in the tunnel of the country club at Bel-Air, thereby “embarrassing [his] dad by being a smart ass.” Wagner’s deliberate act has him maneuvering his father to lose control. As expected, his father “closes his fists and goes after Wagner – ‘again’ – but a couple of other men [hold] him back.” Ironically, Wagner’s reprehensible behavior comes across as more measured and controlled than his father’s! In the end, Wagner one-ups his dad by coming out the “victim winner.”

Unfortunately, however, Wagner’s rivalry with Christopher Walken brings forth a totally different outcome. Although Wagner’s angry outburst one-ups Walken in the short run, Wagner’s maneuvering of the opportunity to confront Walken, coupled with the threesome’s excessive partying and their eventual breakdown in communication, leads ultimately to Natalie’s tragic death. A friend of Wagner recalls, “[Wagner] went through the inquest in a daze and after that he took to his bed for eight days in a catatonic state, blaming himself for [Natalie’s] death. He’s never entirely recovered, but how can you?”

Perhaps trumping his alleged rival at the cost of losing his wife silenced Wagner for 27 years. In hindsight, had Wagner and his father been able to confront and resolve their issues long ago, history may have been written differently. As it turns out, however, Wagner’s need to challenge a suspected or perhaps imagined rival got the best of him – literally.

Robert J. Wagner: "Number Two"

2009-04-24T19:56:00.019-05:00

Actor Robert J. Wagner has been active in Hollywood for nearly six decades. His memorable work includes A Kiss before Dying, The Longest Day, The Pink Panther, the Austin Powers series of spy spoofs, and many others. He also starred in three popular television series: It Takes a Thief; Switch; and Hart to Hart and has been featured on the current popular sitcom Two and a Half Men.

In Wagner’s recently published memoir, Pieces of My Heart: A Life (2008), released twenty-seven years after the mysterious death of his wife, screen star Natalie Wood, Wagner tells for the first time his story of what happened on the night of Wood’s death. Wagner also reveals his clandestine love affair with Barbara Stanwyck when she was forty-five and he only twenty-two and just getting started in Hollywood. Their romance lasted four years.

But to really know the man, let’s first understand Robert Wagner's earliest memories and bring to light his worldview.

Please vote for the one choice that best represents Robert Wagner's worldview... and thank you for participating!

Robert Wagner remembers….

1. When I was little, I stuck something in an electrical socket and blew out every outlet in the house. My father was in the bathroom shaving, and he came roaring out, grabbed me, put me over his knee, spanked me with a hair brush, then threw me off his lap for this terrible thing I had done.

2. When I was seven, my father took me to the train station in Detroit and tipped the porter $10.00 to make sure the package – his son – arrived safely. On my coat was a tag: “Deliver this boy to Mrs. Pierce, Hollywood Military Academy; Hollywood, California." As soon as the train pulled out of the station, I ripped the tag off my coat.

3. My father has opened a checking account for me so that I could pay my expenses on the trip. I remember that in Albuquerque I went into a souvenir shop and bought an antique gun so I could protect myself against the marauding Indians I was sure would attack the train at some point.

4. I was sitting under this tree when I was a little kid on a golf course, and I looked down the fairway and I saw these four gentlemen that I’d seen in the movies for so many years – Clark Gable, Fred Astaire, Randolph Scott, and Cary Grant – walking down the fairway, you know, and I looked at these men – and I thought…God, I want to be one of them. That’s what I want to be.

5. Once when I was twelve or thirteen, I took a BB gun and shot all the lights out in the tunnel of the country club at Bel-Air and generally embarrassed my father by being a smart-ass. The country club incident made him close his fists and go after me – again – but a couple of other men held him back.

Robert Wagner's worldview is...
1. I am an actor.
2. I write the lines.
3. I cast the players.
4. I direct the scene.

A Woman's Nation

2009-04-20T21:51:00.009-05:00

As I listened to Maria Shriver's Special Report via NBC News today, I couldn't help but reflect on the extraordinary women highlighted on Thinkwriter, such as Eleanor Roosevelt (mentioned by name in the clip); Hillary Clinton, Mae West, and others. We are living in a challenging and exciting time for women, especially when we realize all the possibilities going forward. Please let me and others know what you think. According to Shriver, women's voices have been too quiet.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Mae West's Worldview: XY-Rated

2009-04-06T21:45:00.031-05:00

When I was a little girl playing dress up with my sisters, we’d take turns striking a pose to imitate Mae West’s famous line: “Why don’t you come up and see me sometime, big boy?” Then we’d giggle as if we knew exactly what that meant.

If you grew up during the twentieth century, you had to be living under a rock, as the saying goes, not to know something about Mae West. Best known as a comedian and actress, West’s brassy over-the-top behavior made her famous long before the likes of Entertainment Tonight and PerezHilton.com supplied the public with daily doses of celebrity news and gossip.

Mae West lived a spectacular show business life – at least according to stories about her. She was daring, brazen and completely original. She worked hard to be famous. Even her trademark walk was learned by observing female impersonators. And with her mother’s blessing, who thought everything her daughter did was fabulous, Mae West danced the shimmy when others wouldn’t, wrote her own risqué plays when none were available, and supported gay rights long before most people really understood the concept.

Her first starring Broadway role was in a play she wrote, directed, and produced entitled Sex. The scandalous production caught the attention of city officials and West was arrested along with the cast and prosecuted on morals charges. She was sentenced to ten days in prison on Welfare Island, but enjoyed an early release for “good behavior,” which apparently included dining with the warden and his wife.

West wrote several other plays, including The Wicked Age, Pleasure Man, and The Constant Sinner. Perhaps we can detect an emerging …shall we say, theme?

Many books and articles detail West’s amazing career, but it must be included here that by 1933, West was the eighth-largest U.S. box office draw in the United States and by 1935, the second-highest paid person in the United States (after William Randolph Hearst)! In addition, she was famous for a litany of quips and double entendres. Her wit and risqué references guaranteed public outrage, plenty of notoriety, and high praise from adoring fans.

Thinkwriters have only to read Mae West’s earliest memories a single time to realize that even as a youngster she put grand effort into controlling and dominating her environment. According to West....

When I was a girl, I understood right away that there was this double-standard thing for men and women, not just in sex, but in everything. A man’s world was one of freedom, a woman’s one of limitations. I believe in a single standard for men and women . . . . Many women’s lives are defined by the man or men in their lives. I wanted to define my own life.

One of the things that apparently made West angry was people who wouldn’t stand up for themselves. She also disliked boundaries and rules that constrained her. With all of this in mind, which of the four worldviews belongs to Mae West?

To make the best choice, let us first review the memories.

In memory #1, Mae West summons a dog with unique markings so she and the dog can be photographed together. Believing herself to be as distinctive and memorable as the dog (and already knowing she can get others to do her bidding), West orchestrates a “photo shoot.” Even as a child, Mae West "directs" with an eye for what will draw the viewer’s attention. Of course, personal desire drives her behavior – desire to stand out, to be the center of attention, and to get what she wants. Already she is a force of nature!

In memory #2, we witness the same scenario, except by this time (age 4), West recognizes that some people see her as “difficult.” Even so, her desire does not waiver. Fully supported by her mother, West is allowed to have the doll of her choosing, even though the one doll she wants is the most difficult to retrieve – not unlike herself – absolutely extraordinary but difficult to possess and control.

In memory #3, desire again permeates the recollection. West poses and gazes at herself in every mirror that reflects her image along a fine residential section of specialty shops with mirrored doors. Staring in the window of a jewelry store, West recalls seeing an actual “diamond” hanging on a velvet bust and imagines that owning it would guarantee her happiness. Given West’s penchant for the double entendre, we can also imagine what this so-called “hanging diamond” might represent to Mae West, a woman accustomed to capitalizing on the power of sex and sexualized entertainment.

And finally, in memory #4, West recalls hearing “great audience applause” . . . “applause just for me, and I knew then there wasn’t any other place I ever wanted to be.” Again, desire is the theme – desire for more attention, more applause, more approval, and more adoration. In this memory, we see a little girlness about her – a child playing an adult. She is dressed up like a cartoon character – a Betty Boop-like figure but with blond hair. And even though she has a child-like innocence about her, her naïveté is “applied” with great skill. Like the fox cleverly getting what it wants, West knows how to apply her innocence with just the right amount of shrewdness to have her way.

Based on her earliest memories, only one worldview fits Mae West perfectly.

To begin, the correct answer is not “I have to win.” For Mae West, winning is like breathing; no appreciable effort is required and thus no energy is assigned.

“Women rule” is also incorrect. If anything, “Men rule” would be more appropriate. Based on her memories, West didn’t identify with women as a group. She put herself above women. She saw herself as extraordinary and special – as distinctive as a dog with long white hair and one black eye and one black ear – and as discerning as a doll connoisseur capable of identifying the one best doll among hundreds.

#3, “I’m courageous,” is also not the best answer. In the absence of fear, courage is a non-issue. Not a hint of fear is detected in any of West’s four memories. Quite the opposite in fact; she remembers ordering people around from the time she was a child, thereby learning how to get her way with ease. Getting one’s way doesn’t involve courage; it involves entitlement and moxie, precisely what Mae West possessed in spades – giving a whole new meaning to the term “ball gown,” her signature attire.

Thus, we see that Mae West’s worldview is “I’m the man.” West approached her world as though she was the man. “Come up and see me sometime,” is the man’s line. Sexual aggression is the man’s prerogative. Hiding vulnerabilities is the talent of men. Men rely on their instincts and so did Mae West from the time she was a little girl - a little girl who wanted her picture taken with a dog, not a doll - and a little girl who was encouraged to have her way, no matter the cost to others.

Little girls are instructed to be “little ladies,” but boys are coached to go-for-it; to take what they want; to stand up for themselves; fight if they have to; and never let others push them around, no matter who it is. Especially during Mae West’s lifetime (1893-1980), being a woman had major limitations, but being a man promised great freedom. This was a time when the powerful often took advantage of others’ innocence.

Mae West was determined to control and dominate her own space and to gain respect by being strong and decisive, just as her earliest memories portray. In fact, it was never difficult for Mae West to make fun of women, because when one has the point of view of the man, making fun of women is easy. Indeed, Mae West was born a woman, but she had a take charge perspective from the beginning. In her own words, “I created myself. I developed myself. I didn’t turn out exactly this way all at once, though I wasn’t different when I was a little girl...”

MAE WEST: "When I'm good, I'm very good. When I'm bad, I'm better."

2009-03-29T08:32:00.036-05:00

In a Thinkwriter post entitled “bat-out-of-hell” published in 2007, readers were invited to name “Carrie Ann’s” worldview by way of perhaps her most revealing early childhood recollection.

Carrie Ann’s childhood memory is the story of a brief verbal exchange between her mother and father, followed by a request for a favor from Carrie Ann by her mother. At one point in the recollection, Carrie Ann’s mother refers to her daughter as a “bat-out-of-hell.”

Readers of Thinkwriter were asked to think about Carrie Ann’s memory and to select her worldview from a list of four possibilities: (1.) I have to win, (2.) Women rule, (3.) I’m courageous, and (4.) I’m the man.

(To learn more about Carrie Ann’s worldview, please read the post entitled, “a smug little smile says it all.”)

What follows now are four engaging earliest memories from the indomitable queen of the bawdy double entendres, the remarkable Mae West. Actress, playwright, screenwriter, and sex symbol, West was one of the most controversial stars of her day . . . and way ahead of her time!

Taken from the 2009 biography of West by Charlotte Chandler, Mae West’s earliest memories clearly demonstrate West's approach to life.

And so you may be wondering…what do Carrie Ann and Mae West have in common, if anything?

For one thing, they have in common the list of choices for worldview. Thinkwriter is using the same four worldview choices for Mae West as previously offered for Carrie Ann’s worldview selection. Whether or not these two women share the same worldview (or anything else, for that matter), remains to be seen. Stay tuned!

In the meantime, after you read Mae West’s four memories, please choose from the following list the best worldview for Mae West. Vote in the poll to the right, and thank you so much for participating! (poll now closed - correct answer is #4)

(1.) I have to win. (33% chose this response)
(2.) Women rule. (25%)
(3.) I’m courageous. (16%)
(4.) I’m the man. (25%)

And here we go…

1. (Chandler writes…) One of Mae’s earliest memories was her desire to have her picture taken with a dog, a very particular dog with long white hair, a black eye and a black ear, which she had seen ‘around the corner.’ One of her uncles was delegated to bring the elusive canine in.

2. “We went to a store and there were a hundred dolls. Everyone thought all the dolls looked alike. The one I wanted was on the highest shelf no one could reach. Everyone in the store thought I just wanted that one because I was difficult. But I wanted her because she had a mauve dress. If you see the difference and other people don’t, they just think you’re being difficult. I always knew what I wanted. My mother never questioned it. She made them get a ladder and get me the one I wanted.”

3. “I grew up in Brooklyn in a fine residential section near a block of those single buildings, one story high and all French, housing a barber shop, a millinery shop and a hairdressings parlour, all with mirrors in the doors and windows, long fancy work at the bottom, and I’d pose as I’d walk along and I’d look at myself this way and then that way…In a window of a jewelry story there used to be a big diamond hanging on a black velvet bust and I’d say to myself, “I’ve got to have a diamond like you and then I’d be absolutely more than happy.”

4. (Chandler writes…) About her earliest stage appearance as “Baby May – Song and Dance,” at a Sunday concert at the Royal Theatre in Fulton Street, Brooklyn, at the age of seven “going on eight,” at which she wore “a pink and green satin dress with gold spangles and a large white lace picture hat,” with pink slippers and stockings…and sang “Movin’ Day” to great audience applause and won a gold medal from the Elks….Mae West says,” I heard the applause…applause just for me, and I knew they really liked me, and I knew then there wasn’t any other place I ever wanted to be.”

Not Exactly Spring Break

2009-03-17T22:31:00.008-05:00

As you can see, I have been taking a break from Thinkwriter, though soon I will post a set of memories from a well-known person my sisters and I used to imitate when we were little girls playing dress-up. Please stay tuned!

In the meantime, I have looked back over many of the previous posts – as though I didn’t even write them myself. I appreciate that some are much better written than others – and maybe some are just more interesting – possibly due to the memory content or because the person’s worldview turned out to be a real surprise. Whatever the case, I have had fun writing every post.

And one thing is for sure – I have learned so much – not only from the memories – but from their owners! Thank you to all the stars of Thinkwriter for sharing your earliest memories in print and/or in person.

Incidentally, Thinkwriter now has viewers from well over 100 cities around the world. From Philadelphia to Dundee; from Portsmouth to Istanbul; and from Santa Jose to Beijing – (and the list goes on and on!), we’re all reading early memories and discovering worldviews together.

And by the way, what is your earliest memory? Learn what it says to you ….and in time, guess what? You will actually remember your future …I promise.

Charles Darwin: Man with a Daring and Restless Mind

2009-02-24T09:44:00.025-06:00

Known for setting forth a theory so controversial that people still debate and resist its concepts, the remarkable Charles Darwin has been taking heat for 150 years!

First published in 1859, Darwin’s Origin of the Species proposes that all life forms in present time originated from a few common ancestors, thereby explaining many of the fundamental commonalities among all living things. Most controversial, of course, is Darwin’s conclusion that given billions of years and millions of changes in life forms, whole new and complex organisms could become individual species – even us humans!

Wow! Was Darwin’s idea supported by others? Some say Darwin just had the lucky number in a lineage of over two thousand years of progress toward the concept of evolution; but he alone, after twenty years of his own careful collecting, studying, and analysis – and in the face of a highly skeptical world – put his theory of evolution out there for public scrutiny and open discourse. Thus, it is to Darwin we look when debates about evolution erupt in homes, schools, churches, and other institutions throughout society.

Without a doubt, the implications of Darwin’s big idea were (and still are) considered profound, not only for science, but also for philosophy, sociology, and psychology in equal proportions. Predictably and naturally, therefore, many people began (mis)using Darwin’s proposals to support their own outlying viewpoints, in particular ideas endorsing racist, atheistic, and aggressive philosophies not supported by divine law. And therein rests the problem.

Even so, subsequent discoveries have not diminished Darwin’s scientific position, most likely because his books are like “stepping stones to future knowledge,” rather than scripts of dogmatism meant to supersede religious faith.

And even though the debate will go on (and on and on), of interest to Thinkwriter at this time is the discovery of Darwin’s worldview.

To know Darwin’s worldview, let us recognize the common element in his recollections. Interestingly, as it turns out, each of his memories contains a piece of evidence, a relic, or a remnant of something that compels Darwin to know more. Darwin paid attention to artifacts – those “survival of the fittest” elements "remaining" in his recollection storehouse for a lifetime.

We will begin with memory #10 and then work our way backwards to the first memory. In memory #10, the relics are “excitement” and “trembling…hands.” “Deep mortification" is the artifact in memory #9, and in #8, it is a rush of power. In memory #7, the artifact is “astonishment;” in #6, it is “the horse with the man’s empty boots and carbine suspended to the saddle.” In memory #5, the relic is a felt sense of delight “at them declaring they had never seen a boy run so fast,” and in #4, it is “a hoard of [stolen] fruit.” In memory #3, the relic is “a monstrous fable;” and in #2, the artifacts are his mother’s death-bed, her black velvet gown, and her curiously constructed work-table.” And finally, in the first memory, what remains are “some events and places…with some little distinctions.”

Yes! Every one of Darwin’s earliest memories contains evidence of what was but no longer is. And in Darwin’s remembrance of what is remaining, he tries to make sense of what was before.

For example, in memory #10, Darwin recognizes his “excitement” and “trembling…hands” . . . each of which point back to “killing my first snipe” – an experience “so great” that “I had much difficulty in reloading my gun.”

In memory #9, “deep mortification” results when Darwin recalls his father saying to him, “You care for nothing but shooting, dogs, and rat-catching and you will be a disgrace to yourself and all your family.” Darwin notes his shame and also has difficulty reconciling the notion that “the kindest man I ever knew” would say “such words.” He deduces that his father must have been angry and “somewhat unjust….”

This memory is important, because “shooting, dogs, and rat-catching” is Darwin’s claim to fame! Darwin’s love of natural history begins with a passion for collecting and shooting that later becomes the passion of the theorizer.

In memory #8, the artifact is a sense of power. As a “very little boy,” Darwin recalls feeling a rush of power while beating a puppy. When a youngster first experiences his or her own power – that sense of domination over the weaker – it can be intoxicating, if even for a moment. If a child does not know the difference between right and wrong, or if he or she has no moral compass or even the genesis of a moral compass, the sensation of hurting another living creation produces no remorse whatsoever. In Darwin’s case, he labels his own conduct cruel and apparently holds on to the memory for a lifetime – perhaps to keep his power in check.

In memory #7, Darwin turns a simple fall into something extraordinary! While walking along a foot-path and then falling unexpectedly off the edge (as some would say his theory of evolution was guilty of doing!), Darwin observes that a number of thoughts pass through his mind rather quickly. Having so many thoughts in quick succession “astonishes” Darwin, because he knows physiologists have said each thought requires “quite an appreciable amount of time” to develop. Darwin’s fascination with his own finding suggests his reluctance to reframe his experience to match what was claimed by others. This is the mark of a true scientist – the willingness to be fascinated by the unexpected rather than to walk through life with prefabricated expectations.

In memory #6, the artifact is “the horse with the man’s empty boots and carbine suspended to the saddle.” Here we can see easily the artifacts of a soldier – his horse, boots, and saddle – stark evidence of what was but no longer is.

In memory #5, the artifact is a feeling of delight upon hearing “they had never seen a boy run so fast!” Here we have a kid looking for affirmation – even if it means having to steal apples. Not surprisingly, the trick is on Darwin when the boys and young men who receive the apples compliment Darwin’s running – not because of his fast running, but because they want all the apples. Although the compliment actually gets “stolen back” in the end, Darwin is not so much disappointed as he is delighted at being able to reflect on how good it feels when others compliment him.

In memory #4, the artifact is “a hoard of [stolen] fruit.” Here Darwin asks others to make sense of what is found. Again, in an apparent quest for attention, Darwin on the surface seems to be looking for the opportunity to be a hero – and thereby receive appreciation from his father or others. On a deeper level, he is acting out the process of solving a mystery about life when all one has in order to make the discovery is what is in front of him – in this case, a pile of fruit.

In memory #3, the artifact is “a monstrous fable.” Darwin recalls telling another boy that he could produce different colored flowers by watering them with different colored fluids. This memory seems prophetic when we consider the central argument of evolution versus creationism and/or intelligent design.

In memory #2, the artifact is his mother’s “death-bed, her black velvet gown, and her curiously constructed work-table.” Not unlike memory #6, this recollection references the artifacts of what was before. The death-bed is like the horse; the velvet gown is the boots, and the work-table is the rifle. Again, those things that survive us after death seem to be the “fittest” of our possessions – the things that say the most about us.

In memory #1, the artifact is “some events and places…with some little distinctions.” Even in memories, the things we hold on to are the “fittest,” the most important moments for us. Darwin doesn’t tell us precisely what his favorite “events and places with some little distinctions” are, but we know they are important to him, because he has kept them in his mind’s eye for a lifetime.

Throughout all Darwin’s earliest memories, artifacts compel him to know more – to look backwards – to reflect – to figure out – to wonder about himself and about what he saw, felt, and learned. It is said of Darwin that he had a “daring and restless mind,” and after discerning the evidence in his earliest recollections, we must surely concur.

Happy Birthday Charles Darwin!

2009-02-12T06:29:00.022-06:00

Yes, Happy Birthday Charles Darwin (September 12, 1809 – April 19, 1882) . . . and you’re looking pretty good for being 200 years old! Matter of fact, we talk about you as though you’re still around to defend yourself! Even today, there is an engaging article about you in The New York Times.

Of interest to Thinkwriter, of course, are your earliest memories and what they tell us about you and your worldview.

Taken from your autobiography, the following earliest memories are just too good to omit even one.

Charles Darwin remembers…..

1. My earliest recollection goes back only to when I was a few months over four years old, when we went to Abergele for sea-bathing, and I recollect some events and places there with some little distinctions.

2. My mother died in July 1817, when I was a little over eight years old, and it was odd that I can remember hardly anything about her except her death-bed, her black velvet gown, and her curiously constructed work-table.

3. One little event (when I was about age eight) has fixed itself very firmly in my mind…I told another little boy that I could produce variously coloured Polyanthuses and Primroses by watering them with certain coloured fluids, which was of course a monstrous fable and had never been tried by me.

4. I remember I once gathered much valuable fruit from my Father’s trees and hid them in the shrubbery, and then ran in breathless hast to spread the news that I had discovered a hoard of stolen fruit.

5. When I was a very little boy I remember stealing apples from the orchard, for the sake of giving them away to some boys and young men who lived in a cottage not far off, but before I gave them the fruit I showed off how quickly I could run and it is wonderful that I did not perceive that the surprise and admiration which they expressed at my powers of running, was given for the sake of the apples. But well I remember that I was delighted at them declaring that they had never seen a boy run so fast!

6. I remember clearly one other incident during the years whilst at Mr. Case’s daily school – namely, the burial of a dragoon-soldier; and it is surprising how clearly I can still see the horse with the man’s empty boots and carbine suspended to the saddle, and the firing over the grave.

7. Once, whilst returning to school on the summit of the old fortifications round Shrewsbury, which has been converted into a public foot-path with no parapet on one side, I walked off and fell to the ground, but the height was only seven or eight feet. Nevertheless the number of thoughts which passed through my mind during this very short, but sudden and wholly unexpected fall, was astonishing and seem hardly compatible with what physiologists have, I believe, proved about each thought requiring quite an appreciable amount of time.

8. Once as a very little boy, whilst at the day-school, or before that time, I acted cruelly, for I beat a puppy I believe, simply from enjoying the sense of power; but the beating could not have been severe, for the puppy did not howl, of which I feel sure as the spot was near to the house.

9. To my deep mortification, my father once said to me, “You care for nothing but shooting, dogs, and rat-catching and you will be a disgrace to yourself and all your family.” (But my father who was the kindest man I ever knew, and whose memory I love with all my heart, must have been angry and somewhat unjust when he used such words.)

10. How well I remember killing my first snipe and my excitement was so great that I had much difficulty in reloading my gun from the trembling of my hands.

Charles Darwin’s worldview is…. (Poll is now closed and correct answer is in red.)
1. I live to imagine. (0%)
2. I am compelled to know. (40%)
3. I see things my way. (40%)
4. I am fit to survive. (20%)
Please vote in the poll to the right . . . and thank you for participating!

King's Worldview: Man Is the System

2009-02-02T20:43:00.046-06:00

In his tragically short life, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and his followers managed to bulldoze America’s most mean-spirited social system - the one that had blacks using different counters, different doors, different water fountains, bathrooms, and sides of the street as compared to whites . . . even as it also disallowed the most highly educated blacks the right to vote or serve on juries . . . and instituted the establishment of separate schools, disparate opportunities, and lopsided expectations for school children based entirely on skin color.

In fact, America was not really the leader of the free world previous to Martin Luther King and his movement for black equality. Had King and the blacks and whites who marched with him stopped short of their goal, vast regions of the U.S. would have remained morally no different than South Africa under apartheid.

Interestingly, King’s approach in attacking this problem was inspired by the triumphs of Gandhi’s non-violent activism. King, like Gandhi, was actually more violent against the system by being non-violent. And of course, he was also clever - and he had that voice.

Of interest to Thinkwriter is that King not only recognized the ineffectiveness of aggression to create lasting social change, he also bet on the idea that given the opportunity, man would correct racial discrimination from the inside out. Here was a man who understood well that Jesus wouldn’t condone what whites did to blacks. Thus, coming from the point of view that “man is the system,” King marched toward the problem of segregation, pushing against a litany of arbitrary standards that ultimately crumbled under his non-violent pressure.

His approach was not without a hidden physical price, however. We all know he was killed by an assassin, but King’s autopsy also revealed he had the heart of a 60-year-old man inside his 39 year-old body. Doctors hypothesize the stress of “fighting” for civil rights for 13 grueling years aged him well beyond his expected maturity.

And today, it is tribute to Martin Luther King’s overwhelmingly positive impact that nearly every major city in the U.S. has a street or school named after him. On the flip side, it is also evidence of humanity’s resistance to change, as well as a vast misunderstanding of King’s true gift to America that most memorials are located only in black neighborhoods – at least at this time.

Of further interest to Thinkwriter are also the many gems in his earliest memories.

In memory #1, we find the five year old King taking note of people “standing in bread lines.” Besides King’s likely observation (as an adult looking back) that hunger doesn’t discriminate, we can only imagine how many times an active five-year-old boy (King’s age at the time) was cautioned to “get in line.” Children, of course, hear the literal meaning of phrases like “get in line” or “I’m going to line you out, if you don’t stand still!” But for one little boy growing up as a minority, such an admonishment might also take on a double meaning – setting up little eyes to take special notice of desperate-looking people finding themselves “gettin' in line” along a busy public street.

In memory #2, King remembers feeling competitive. When his sister steps forward ahead of him to join the church, King doesn’t want to be left behind. He recalls the feeling of being second but wanting to be first.

In memory #3, we can imagine his disappointment over an aborted friendship. Whether or not the friend’s father actually told his son he could no longer play with the young King, the friend explained it that way . . . and although probably true in this instance, how often do children and adults use the contrived admonitions of an absent personal or business authority figure to justify or sell their own wants and needs? People are quick to abdicate their power to an invisible other when a confrontation appears difficult or awkward.

Regardless the reason, however, being boldly told the friendship was over was a complete shock to the young King. Wasn’t King the one doing this kid a favor, after all? In King’s neighborhood, King was the social superior! The friend was only a visitor – the son of a store owner (or maybe just a manager) working across the street from the King’s home. As pastor of the church, King’s father was practically the king of the neighborhood, after all…and the King family was not “poor” in any category imaginable. And hadn’t these boys played together for several years?

King believes this to be his first real taste of racial discrimination, and it’s a bitter one. Whether or not the friendship actually ended solely because of prejudice, in King’s mind there could have been no other reason. When social structures are unjust, they quickly become the reason for any perceived wrong; however, when social structures are just, additional truths about life can emerge.

Memory #4 brings to mind one of the many unreasonable barriers imposed on blacks by whites at the time. In this incident, King’s father refuses to purchase shoes from a store in which blacks must sit toward the back of the store to receive service. The senior King respectfully makes his anger known first and then exits the store with son in hand. This scenario is a valuable lesson for the young King. He can admire a father who at first attempts to reason with the clerk, and then later lets the clerk know his disapproval in words and behavior. Too often people say one thing – but do another.

Integrity is at play only when a person’s words and behavior match perfectly. How often do children hear one thing from their parents and witness the exact opposite?And what about America’s integrity? Weren't we all, in effect, saying one thing and doing another?

I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands: One nation under God, indivisible, with Liberty and Justice for all.

Memory #5 is apparently only a glimpse of a larger memory in which King somehow gets slapped and denigrated by a woman he describes as “a white lady, of course.” We see that by age eight, King’s heart is clearly turned against people who are white. He has learned to discriminate just as he has been discriminated against. Similar to love - which grows when we extend it to others - the inevitable outcome of practicing hate is the creation of more hate.

And finally in Memory #6, King’s pain and anger seem palpable. Following the excitement of his big win at the oratorical contest, the teacher and her student are forced to stand in the aisle of the bus and ride for the 90 mile trip home, even while whites who boarded the bus after King and his teacher are allowed to take the seats of any blacks (by law) and probably sleep all the way back to Atlanta!

The year would have been 1943; over a decade prior to the Supreme Court legally striking down segregation and of course many, many years before Americans would begin embracing the spirit of desegregation. Note that Mrs. Bradley and the young King obey the law, yet they know the law is flawed. King was fortunate to have good people around him who taught him how to manage the social climate of the day and who encouraged him to develop his skills – like the skill of oration, for example. His teacher made the trip to the oratorical contest possible, even though riding a bus in those days was never without risk for people of color. Thus, in a truly significant way, Mrs. Bradley helped make Martin Luther King’s “I Have a Dream” speech the memorable presentation it was and remains to this day.

Martin Luther King: Dream Maker

2009-01-23T19:28:00.020-06:00

Few historical figures are as compelling as Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Similar to Billy Graham, King had a presence, a calling, and a following, but most important of all, King had a voice . . . a voice bigger than life . . . a voice impossible to ignore.

What follows are six of King’s earliest memories. Thinkwriter invites you to read the memories and then select King’s worldview from the list at the bottom of the post. Please cast your vote in the poll to the right of the list, and thank you for participating!

Martin Luther King remembers . . .

(1.) [I was much too young to remember the beginning of the depression] . . . but I do recall, when I was about five years of age, how I questioned my parents about the numerous people standing in bread lines.

(2.) I joined the church at the age of five. I well remember how this event occurred. Our church was in the midst of a spring revival, and a guest evangelist had come down from Virginia. On Sunday morning the evangelist came into our Sunday school to talk to us about salvation, and after a short talk on this point, he extended an invitation to any of us who wanted to join the church. My sister was the first to join the church that morning, and after seeing her join I decided I would not let her get ahead of me, so I was the next.

(3.) When I was about six years of age, an incident happened. From the age of three I had a white playmate who was about my age. We always felt free to play our childhood games together. He did not live in our community, but he was usually around every day; his father owned a store across the street from our home. At the age of six, we both entered school – separate schools, of course. I remember how our friendship began to break as soon as we entered school; this was not my desire but his. The climax came when he told me one day that his father had demanded that he would play with me no more. I never will forget what a great shock this was to me. I immediately asked my parents about the motive behind such a statement.

(4.) I remember a trip to a downtown shoe store with Father when I was still small. We had sat down in the first empty seats in the front of the store. A young white clerk came up and murmured politely: “I’ll be happy to wait on you if you’ll just move to those seats in the rear.”

Dad immediately retorted, “There’s nothing wrong with these seats; we’re quite comfortable here.”

“Sorry,” said the clerk, “but you’ll have to move.”

“We’ll either buy shoes sitting here,” my father retorted, “or we won’t buy shoes at all!” ...whereupon he took my hand and walked out of the store.

This was the first time I had seen Dad so furious. I still remember walking down the street beside him as he muttered, “I don’t care how long I have to live with this system; I will never accept it.”

(5.) When I was about eight years old, I was in one of the downtown stores of Atlanta, and all of the sudden someone slapped me, and the only thing I heard was somebody saying, “You are that nigger that stepped on my foot.” And it turned out to be a white lady; of course, I did not retaliate at any point. I wouldn’t dare retaliate when a white person was involved. I finally told my mother what had happened, and she was very upset about it. But the lady who has slapped me had gone, and my mother and I left the store almost immediately.

(6.) When I was fourteen, I traveled from Atlanta to Dublin, Georgia, with a dear teacher of mine, Mrs. Bradley. I participated in an oratorical contest there and I succeeded in winning the contest. My subject, ironically enough, was “The Negro and the Constitution.” That night Mrs. Bradley and I were on the bus returning to Atlanta. Along the way, some white passengers boarded the bus, and the white driver ordered us to get up and give the whites our seats. We didn’t move quickly enough to suit him, so he began cursing us. I intended to stay right in that seat, but Mrs. Bradley urged me up, saying we had to obey the law. We stood up in the aisle for ninety miles to Atlanta. That night will never leave my memory. It was the angriest I have ever been in my life.

Martin Luther King’s worldview is . . . (correct answer in red)

1. If the shoe fits, wear it. (11%)
2. Man is the system. (44%)
3. The red man will get ahead, man! (0)
4. Anger motivates. (44%)

Life Isn't Everything...Thank Goodness

2009-01-10T19:18:00.026-06:00

Billy Graham’s earliest memories are just what we might expect: each a story hinting at the extraordinary; each a reminder that life isn’t everything.

In memory #1, little Billy and his sister are called out of school, a bizarre occurrence in itself, only to learn that their grandmother has had a vision in which she witnessed not only Jesus reaching out to her but also she saw Ben who is now whole and healthy! What better proof that Jesus and a healing heaven exist than to hear it almost first-hand from one’s very own grandmother, for heaven’s sake? And there's more...

In memory #2, little Billy seems to credit himself with the resolution of an unholy conflict: a cat forced upon a dog and shut up in hell for the night. Fighting like cats and dogs is an expression for a reason, but often cats and dogs do find peace in the same space. What appears to intrigue the young Graham, however, is the anticipation (and recognition) of the conflict – that inevitable struggle experienced also by every feeling human on a daily basis – be it with the devil in the world or the devil within.

In fact, Graham’s stock and trade is conflict resolution of the highest calling. His work is to bring to mind the struggle of good and evil – of the saved and the unsaved – reminding those who will listen there is a life after life, which is a good thing since life as we know it will not last forever. And, oh by the way, the end of life may come at any minute, so why not get ready now? Besides, if cats and dogs can find resolution, what prevents mankind from finding peace – except for the presence of that unruly ego?

And finally, in memory #3, Graham recalls the ultimate struggle of life and death. Imagine growing up with the knowledge that your own mother might have caused your death . . . had you not been miraculously saved by Aunt Jennie’s antidote? What better proof that death is always imminent and that being “saved” is completely plausible? Moreover, when even a well-intended mother can so easily commit an evil act, then surely we ALL need an intervention. Let’s not forget that the road to hell is paved with good intentions – even more proof that our best is never good enough.

Thus, as we would expect, Graham’s early recollections suggest the worldview: Life isn’t everything. All three memories support the existence of a parallel world – a spiritual matrix in which everything is held together by a wisdom that requires faith – (you know… the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen). And coming from the man who has been selling an invisible commodity for almost seven decades, we would expect nothing less.

Billy Graham - Number 7

2009-01-04T12:10:00.013-06:00

Southern Baptist, Evangelical Christian, and spiritual adviser to multiple U.S. presidents, Billy Graham has preached to more people around the globe than any Protestant in history. Number seven on Gallup’s list of admired people for the 20th century, the 90-year-old Graham is currently front page news simply for moving his church membership from First Baptist Dallas to First Baptist Church in Spartanburg, South Carolina, about 85 miles from his current home in Montreat, North Carolina. (...and Thinkwriter will add more about Billy Graham in the days to come.)

For now, let’s take a look at Graham’s earliest memories to determine the worldview of the man who first made America safe for public testimonies of faith. What follows are three of Graham's earliest memories in his own words. Please vote for the worldview that best fits Billy Graham, and thank you for participating!

Billy Graham remembers...

1. When Grandmother Coffey died, I was in elementary school, and my sister Catherine and I were called out of school. [I learned] Grandmother had sat up in the bed and almost laughingly said, “I see Jesus. He has his arms outstretched to me. And there’s Ben! He has both of his eyes and both of his legs!”

(Ben Coffey was her husband. He had been badly wounded in the Civil War, ultimately losing his left leg and sight in his right eye.)

2. We always had a collie – at least one – and what would any farm be without plenty of cats? Not knowing any better, I once took a cat and shut it in the doghouse with the dog. They hated each other with some ancient instinct when they went in, but after spending the night inside they came out as friends forever.

3. I had one narrow brush with death as a child. Once when I was sick, Mother thought she was giving me cough medicine but she gave me iodine instead. If it had not been for a quick call to Aunt Jennie, who suggested some thick cream from the dairy to counteract the iodine, I might have died.

Billy Graham’s worldview is…. (Please select the best answer and vote in the poll to the right.) [Poll is now closed. See correct answer in red.]

1. Life is an experiment. (25%)
2. Life is a contest. (8%)
3. Life is a magazine. (0%)
4. Life isn’t everything. (66%)

Eleanor Roosevelt's Worldview

2008-12-26T16:14:00.015-06:00

Eleanor Roosevelt’s childhood reminds us of the utter failure of money and privilege to guarantee happiness or a sense of well-being. Though born “well-to-do,” Eleanor’s mother had little to do with her; and her father, an alcoholic, was likewise never dependably available. Even more devastating, her mother died when Eleanor was eight; and her father two years later.

Orphaned by age 10, Eleanor was then reared by her grandmother, tutored privately, and eventually sent to an English finishing school, where she learned French and the value of independent thinking from a noted feminist headmaster.

By age 17, Eleanor was serving as a social worker in the East Side slums of New York City. It was 1902; the same year she met and enjoyed the romantic attention of her father’s fifth cousin, Franklin Delano Roosevelt (FDR), who not only would become her husband and the father of their six children, but also a senator, a governor, and finally President of the United States, the only one ever elected to four terms.

Of interest to Thinkwriter at this time, however, is the identification of Eleanor Roosevelt’s worldview by way of her four earliest childhood recollections.

So, let us begin….

In memory #1, Eleanor Roosevelt recalls being doted on and held high above a crowd of her father’s cronies - an exhilarating experience - or if at all frightening, one that proved to be exciting rather than threatening. As her father picks her up off the ground and holds her high in the air, she readily sacrifices herself to please him. Over the years, she remembers the incident with pleasure and longs to be in that one-up position always – adored and appreciated by the man of the house – the man with the power.

When a person is “one-up,” he or she can do for others; when “one-down,” a person needs others. Recall that FDR’s paralytic illness provided Eleanor the opportunity to be “one-up” and also to have her own mind. Eleanor served as a stand-in for him, making appearances on his behalf and otherwise representing him before and during his New York governorship, as well as when he would become President of the United States. He needed her. In fact, the helping activity she supplied, beginning in the early 1920s, set the stage for what would later be the most active role of any First Lady in history – a position of power fully supported by her incapacitated husband during a time when few women even had careers.

Note in memory #2 that immediately after witnessing others slide down a deep descent, Eleanor chooses to stay on the high road (as she did throughout her life). She chooses to go it alone rather than to place herself in jeopardy, thus remaining “one-up” rather than dependent on the others. She is saying, in effect, “I take the road that is right for me.”

In memory #3, Eleanor recalls the physical pain of coming down Mount Vesuvius and the effort she put forth to hide this discomfort from her father. Once again, she sacrifices herself to do what her father needs her to do. Symbolically, the pain of losing high ground also represents the grief experienced when anything ends – be it an experience, a project, a relationship, even one’s hopes and expectations – a phenomenon considered so uncomfortable for some people that they choose to over-schedule and over-commit rather than to experience the pain of “coming down.”

In memory #4, Eleanor recalls being stuck in a convent before she was six years old. She remembers the upside down value system of the convent experience wherein swallowing a penny resulted in receiving good attention. Feeling alone and abandoned, Eleanor attempts to be recast as someone in need of care in order to regain a one-up sense of value; however, she is soon punished for telling a “tall tale.” Even so, the results work to her favor.

Thinking back on this memory as an adult, Eleanor would have had the knowledge of her mother’s death two years later. Whatever punishment she received would have been a small price to pay for the opportunity to be at home in the final years of her mother’s life.

Of note also is the similarity of this experience to children who appear to have a school phobia. Many times it is not school that is feared. Rather it is the fear of leaving home that is the problem. Some children fear leaving home, because of what might or would likely happen in their absence.

In Eleanor’s case, living in a convent also involved exposing all her inadequacies. She had not received adequate “mothering” and was also more serious minded than other girls her age. In fact, she had been given few, if any opportunities to play with other girls. She couldn’t speak French, was awkward in appearance, and worse yet, there were no men in the convent. Her most positive childhood experiences involved her father; and what hope did she have of seeing him while living in a convent? Thus, she was totally dependent there – not needed by anyone and longing to feel of value.

Thus, we see that Eleanor’s worldview, as evidenced by her early memories is “I have to be needed.” “Taking the low road” was against her principles, but it wasn’t what motivated her behavior, nor was the act of “seeking attention” the incentive for her actions. Rather, when we look behind the curtain of Eleanor Roosevelt’s early memories, we find that her sense of value was based on the idea that she had to earn a place in the affection of others. Although born wealthy and privileged, life’s most valuable asset, love, was not simply afforded her.

Eleanor Roosevelt remembers...

2008-12-14T20:28:00.030-06:00

Since becoming First Lady of the United States in 1933, Anna Eleanor Roosevelt remains to this day the most celebrated wife of any American president, living or deceased. Born to wealthy parents on October 11, 1884, Eleanor lost her mother at age eight and her father two years later. She is pictured here with her father, Elliott Roosevelt, and her two younger brothers, Elliott, Jr. and Hall Roosevelt. In this photograph, she has her father's attention and his hand. What follows are four of Eleanor's earliest recollections.

1. One of my earliest recollections is of being dressed up and allowed to come down to dance for a group of gentlemen who applauded and laughed as I pirouetted before them. Finally, my father picked me up and held me high in the air. He dominated my life as long as he lived, and was the love of my life long after he died.

2. [My father] could be annoyed with me, particularly when I disappointed him in such things as physical courage. We went to Sorrento and I was given a donkey so I could ride over the beautiful roads. One day the others overtook me and offered to let me go with them, but at the first deep descent which they slid down I turned pale, and preferred to stay on the high road. I can remember still the tone of disapproval in my father’s voice though his words of reproof have long since faded away.

3. I remember my trip to Vesuvius with my father and the throwing of pennies, which were returned to us encased in lava, and then the endless trip down. I suppose there was some block in the traffic, but I can remember only my utter weariness and my effort to bear it without tears so that my father would not be displeased.

4. I was sent to a convent to learn French and to be out of the way when the new baby arrived. I was not yet six years old. One of the girls [at the convent] swallowed a penny. Every attention was given to her; she was the center of everybody’s interest. I longed to be in her place. One day I went to one of the sisters and told her I had swallowed a penny. It must have been evident that my story was not true so they sent for my mother. She took me away in disgrace.

Eleanor Roosevelt's worldview is which of the following? Select the best one. (correct answer in red)

1. A bad penny always comes back. (0%)
2. I must seek attention. (30%)
3. I have to be needed. (40%)
4. Stay off the low road. (30%)

Please vote for your choice of Eleanor Roosevelt's worldview in the poll to the right, and thank you for participating!

Treasures, every one...

2008-12-07T22:39:00.012-06:00

When we think about our lives as children, we can easily recall general information about what it was like growing up when we were kids; what we did, where we lived, and what “home” was like for us . . . once upon a time.

Even better, each of us can also bring to mind our very first memory – that one particular, specific incident (or several first-remembered incidents in no particular order) we have never completely forgotten.

It goes like this: “What is the first thing you can remember?”

You: “I remember this one time when…….;” or “Once when I was [age], I ………”

And you tell it….that one specific incident always remembered – and occasionally called to mind over the years without effort or forethought.

This memory seems like nothing special, really, but it is remembered anyway….along with a few other early childhood moments, all of which, as it turns out, hold great value for the person remembering them. It is through the lens of these early memories that one is able to discover his or her worldview.

A Cautionary Tale from Joe Biden, Jr.

2008-11-25T15:12:00.064-06:00

Vice President-elect Joe Biden faced a few challenges when he was a kid, chief among them the likelihood of stuttering when thrown into a new situation or when asked to speak in front of others. Nicknamed Joe Impedimenta by his Latin class schoolmates (impedimenta – “the baggage that impedes one’s progress”); Biden received an exemption from public speaking his high school freshman year because of the stuttering issue. Every other student had to make a presentation at the morning assembly in front of 250 boys, but Biden got a pass. Believing other kids then looked at him like he was stupid; the young Biden reportedly set about to prove he was just like everybody else.

And now….look at the profession he has chosen! Who speaks up more than attorneys do? Today Biden seems always to be talking – even recklessly at times, affording him additional opportunities to keep on talking…and talking, if for no other reason than to correct his errors.

Not unlike his father who eventually sold used cars, Biden found success in selling political agendas, using words in abundance to deliver a point of view and/or to create a vision of the future desired by his constituents. First elected to the Senate in 1972, he has since been reelected six more times and will soon become the first Roman Catholic Vice President of the United States.

In fact, Biden emerged as a natural leader when he was relatively young. While still in high school, he participated in an anti-segregation sit-in at a Wilmington theatre, taking a position against discrimination even as a teenager – and long before it was popular.

Perhaps Biden was more able than most to recognize the presence of discrimination, thanks to experiences in his own life. Beginning with peers who teased him for stuttering and later witnessing family members belittle his father's lack of financial success, Biden is more than philosophically familiar with intolerance.

Birth order theory suggests that first borns, more readily than latter borns, recognize and identify with the productivity strivings of the father. Although Joe Biden’s father was said to be quite prosperous earlier in his life, he was not doing well by the time Joe, Jr. was born.

Joe Biden remembers the early and mostly Protestant neighborhood his father chose for the family to call home. Filled with families of young professionals just starting out at DuPont, most were young, college-educated men working as chemists, accountants, and lawyers. It didn’t take long for Biden, Jr., to label his father “a fish out of water” by comparison. His father was not college educated and not able to see such a hopeful future for his own family. Interestingly, the younger Biden is today ranked as one of the least wealthy members of the Senate – perhaps an inadvertent pledge of allegiance to the senior Biden, our VP-elect's first and most influential role model.

Back in the late 40’s, and due to his father’s financial difficulties, the Biden family was forced to move into the house where Joe Biden’s mom grew up. During this bleak period, his mother’s brothers, the “Finnegan boys,” gave their struggling brother-in-law a really hard time. Joe Biden, Jr., probably took it all in; including, of course, the following exchange with Aunt Gertie.

I remember being up in Aunt Gertie’s musty room on the third floor one night. She was beside me, scratching my back. “Now, honey,” she said, “your father is not a bad man.” This, of course, had never occurred to me. “Your father is not a bad man. He’s just English. But he’s a good man.”

Of interest to Thinkwriter is looking behind the curtain of Joe Biden’s early recollection to identify his worldview.

So, here we go.

Biden’s memory is notable in its simplicity and message. As if by second nature, Aunt Gertie uses ordinary conversation in an attempt to sell a little bigotry to the impressionable Biden. She wants him to recognize what everybody else already knows (according to her): The English are somehow less than the Irish. In effect, “I’ll scratch your back . . . and you’ll be scratching mine when we agree the Irish are better than the English.” She likely wanted to say. . . “How could your father possibly do any better than he’s doing? He’s not Irish!” (Worse yet. . . he's English!)

And as she speaks, Aunt Gertie puncuates her bias with an obsequious back rub, a gesture intended to anchor her point of view in the boy's psyche. From Gertie's lips to Joey’s ears . . . and (it is hoped) . . .from Gertie's lips to Joey’s now better understanding of the problem with Papa Biden: He’s not really "bad;" he’s English.

But hold on. Most significant to the identification of Biden’s worldview is Biden’s spontaneous reflection - “This, of course, had never occurred to me.” In other words, it had never occurred to Biden that his father could or would be labeled ‘a bad man’ or that Biden's father would be called ‘bad’ (at all) or 'bad' because he is English. The idea that goodness or badness should or would be determined, or not, by one’s nationality (or race) is something Biden, Jr. cannot buy (then or now).

Bottom line: Aunt Gertie's “upstairs, musty room deal” never made it out of committee.

Indeed, in Biden’s early recollection we can see and appreciate the insidious nature of indiscriminate discrimination – and how it so easily and seamlessly travels from one generation to the next – passing right through us . . . to the most vulnerable among us. In truth, we all are guilty of delivering these so-called “innocent,” yet biased innuendos along to others. Perhaps we are wise to remember Biden's worldview: Discrimination never sleeps. No matter how many well-crafted workplace and institutional standards of behavior receive the "green light seal of approval," for example, human nature is always awake. When it comes to intolerance, individual people are what make the real difference (or not).

Vice President-elect Joe Biden Remembers

2008-11-15T19:29:00.025-06:00

At twenty-nine years of age, Joseph Robinette Biden, Jr. was first elected to the U.S. Senate in 1972. He was the fifth youngest senator elected and now has served for the sixth longest period among current senators. Perhaps just as interesting is the fact that Biden is the first Roman Catholic to be elected Vice President of the United States . . . but wait . . . there will be more about Biden in the follow-up post.

Of interest to Thinkwriter is first determining Joe Biden’s worldview via a thoughtful understanding of his earliest memory.

We know Vice President-elect Biden is from Delaware (born in Pennsylvania) and that his father, financially successful in the earlier years, struggled later to support his family. Biden's earliest memory originated during a period when the family was “broke” and living in the house where his mother grew up. His mother’s brother was still living there, as was an old maiden aunt, “Grandpop’s sister-in-law, Aunt Gertie Hewitt."

Joe Biden recalls….

I remember being up in Aunt Gertie’s musty room on the third floor one night. She was beside me, scratching my back. “Now, honey,” she said, “your father is not a bad man.” This, of course, had never occurred to me. “Your father’s not a bad man. He’s just English. But he’s a good man.”

~ A young Joe Biden

(about 5 or 6 years old)

Choose what you believe to be Joe Biden's worldview from the choices listed below. Cast you vote in the poll to the right and check back later to learn the results and more about Vice President-elect Joe Biden. (Thank you for participating.)

1. Scratch my back; I’ll scratch yours. (0%)
2. Nationality doesn’t make the man. (33%)
3. Discrimination never sleeps. (66%)
4. Deals happen in musty rooms. (0%)

Please vote now..... (poll closed; correct answer in red)

To Love Is To Lose: Twain's Worldview Revealed

2008-11-02T21:48:00.040-06:00

Mark Twain, humorist, satirist, lecturer, and writer, has been described as “a figure larger than life; massive in talent, eruptive in temperament, unpredictable in his actions.”

Even as a youngster, Sam Clemens (Mark Twain) presented an intriguing personality to the world, as suggested here by his naturally good-humored mother.

Twain writes in his autobiography:

I was told that I was a sickly and precarious and tiresome and uncertain child and lived mainly on allopathic medicines during the first seven years of my life. I asked my mother about this, in her old age – she was in her eighty-eighth year – and said:

“I suppose that during all that time you were uneasy about me?”

“Yes, the whole time.”

“Afraid I wouldn’t live?”

After a reflective pause – ostensibly to think out the facts – “No – afraid you would.”

“It sounds like plagiarism, but it probably wasn’t,” Twain adds.

All tedium aside, Twain is said to have enjoyed a pleasant childhood. Of course, his family was never wealthy. Twain’s father, purportedly highly intelligent and a stern disciplinarian, was only mildly successful as an attorney, though he died of pneumonia when Twain was only eleven. Other untimely endings include the deaths of four of Twain’s six siblings and three of his own four children, as well as his wife's death after 34 years of marriage. Twain died in 1910, at the age of 74. He was survived by his daughter Clara.

Twain has remained a thoroughly interesting character, known for writing about personal experiences and things he knew about from first-hand experience. In addition, Twain revealed his biases about mankind through stories, such as those found in his most celebrated book, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn.

In his novel Huck Finn, for example, Twain revealed his contempt for the “damned human race,” which he said so often creates injustice. Even so, Twain also demonstrated his full appreciation for a single human being such as slave Jim, a person who would have been considered even less than human at the time of the novel’s origin.

Huck Finn's sympathy for other human beings, his shrewdness and ingenuity, his basic intelligence, his good common sense, and his grounded practicality are some of the qualities that make him one the great characters in American fiction. In fact, these are the exact same qualities that make Mark Twain one of the great writers in American literature.

Of primary interest to Thinkwriter is Twain's worldview, clearly displayed in his earliest memories. Each recollection demonstrates Twain’s obvious appreciation for a single human being and also his recognition of the inevitability of loss.

And how interesting to learn that Mark Twain’s worldview is primarily embedded in what he hears as opposed to what he sees, a discrimination of definite significance, given Twain’s renowned use of dialects in his writing. In fact, the dialects used in The Adventures of Huck Finn so captured Ernest Hemingway's admiration that he labeled the Twain's novel "the beginning of American literature" because of them.

But more about the memories!

In Twain’s first memory, he notes the heartrending sound of “moaning” coming from his mother at the bedside of his dead older brother Benjamin – “That dumb sign of anguish . . . perhaps new to me, since it made upon me a very strong impression – an impression which holds its place still with the picture which it helped to intensify and make memorable.”

By his mother's free-flowing tears and moaning, as well as her focused, unrestrained grief, Twain experiences the wretched heartbreak of her loss, a circumstance so painful she cannot even express the pain with words, and he cannot let go of the memory for a lifetime.

In fact, a secondary loss in this instance belongs to the young Twain himself, who not only loses his brother in death but also his childhood innocence, having now experienced first-hand the vulnerability and torment of a fully grieving mother.

In Twain's second memory, he talks about about the “maddening…unendurable” sounds of “singing, whistling, yelling, whooping, and laughing”– all coming from “the noisiest creature that ever was, perhaps, . . . a little slave boy whom we hired from some one, there in Hannibal.”

Similar to the first memory, loss is a clear theme. Twain wants his mother to rid the house of the boy’s noise making, and in her refusal, his mother reminds the young Twain that the slave boy has already lost everything. By singing, the boy’s pain is vanished a little, she explains; he is able to distract himself by making noise. Hearing his mother’s sincerity and seeing it punctuated with tears, the young Twain relinquishes all of his previous inability to have compassion for the “friendless” boy, admitting soon after, “…Sandy’s noise was not a trouble to me any more.”

And finally, in the third memory, Twain recalls the stinging words of a “strapping girl of fifteen,” who states publicly about Twain, “Here’s a boy seven years old who can’t chaw tobacco.” Again, loss is depicted - Twain's loss of standing among his peers.

In fact, the perceived loss is so shameful to Twain that he determines to reform…but alas, to no avail. Even though the path to respect is known by him, Twain cannot achieve it….thus pointing to the essential characteristic of authentic loss: It is unalterable. True loss is permanent, as is the loss of his brother’s life, the loss of Twain’s innocence, the loss of the slave’s boy’s family, freedom, and previous life, and finally, the loss of Twain’s standing among his classmates.

In the first memory, the mother loved deeply, but lost her son anyway. In the second, the cheerful slave boy loved his family, his freedom, and his life, but lost them all anyway. And in the third memory, Twain loved being seen as one of the gang, but lost his standing anyway. In all three memories, the love is pure and right, and the loss is painful and unalterable . . . as well as unavoidable. "Such is life," Twain would say.

Thus we see that from Twain’s worldview, to love is to lose, although Twain would certainly never suggest foregoing love because of the probability of loss. To the contrary, Twain would suggest we throw caution to the wind in the pursuit of our passions; “Put all your eggs in one basket," he would say," and WATCH THAT BASKET.”

Warm summer sun,
shine kindly here;
Warm southern wind,
blow softly here;
Green sod above,
lie light, lie light –
Good-night, dear heart,
good night, good night.

Mark Twain
Epitaph for his daughter

Mark Twain remembers...

2008-10-26T09:07:00.020-05:00

Samuel Langhorne Clemens, "Mark Twain," has been called “the father of American literature.” In his lifetime, he enjoyed great popularity and was a friend to presidents, artists, industrialists, and European royalty.

Born in Missouri on November 30, 1835, Twain was quite familiar with the institution of slavery and explored it in his writing. On the eve of a historic presidential race in which we Americans may surely elect our first black president, let us discover more about Mark Twain and his undeniable worldview.

What follows are three earliest memories from Mark Twain. . . in his own words.

1.
What becomes of the multitudinous photographs which one’s mind takes of people? Out of the million which my camera must have taken of this first and closest friend, only one clear and strongly defined one of early date remains. It dates back forty-seven years; she was forty years old then, and I was eight. She held me by the hand and we were kneeling by the bedside of my brother, two years older than I, who lay dead, and the tears were flowing down her cheeks unchecked. And she was moaning. That dumb sign of anguish was perhaps new to me, since it made upon me a very strong impression – an impression which holds its place still with the picture which it helped to intensify and make memorable.

2.
There [is] …one small incident of my boyhood days …and it must have meant a good deal to me or it would not have stayed in my memory, clear and sharp, vivid and shadowless, all these slow-drifting years. We had a little slave boy whom we hired from some one, there in Hannibal. He was from the eastern shore of Maryland and had been brought away from his family and his friends halfway across the American continent and sold. He was a cherry spirit, innocent and gentle, and the noisiest creature that ever was, perhaps. All day long he was singing, whistling, yelling, whooping, laughing – it was maddening, devastating, unendurable. At last, one day, I lost all my temper and went raging to my mother and said Sandy had been singing for an hour without a single break and I couldn’t stand it and wouldn’t she please shut him up. The tears came into her eyes and her lip trembled and she said something like this:

“Poor thing, when he sings it shows that he is not remembering and that comforts me; but when he is still I am afraid he is thinking and I cannot bear it. He will never see his mother again; if he can sing I must not hinder it, but be thankful for it. If you were older you would understand me; then that friendless child’s noise would make you glad.”

…Sandy’s noise was not a trouble to me any more.

3.
My first visit to the school was when I was seven. A strapping girl of fifteen, in the customary sunbonnet and calico dress, asked me if I “used tobacco” – meaning did I chew it. I said no. It aroused her scorn. She reported me to the crowd and said:

“Here’s a boy seven years old who can't chaw tobacco.”

By the looks and comments which this produced I realized that I was a degraded object; I was cruelly ashamed of myself. I determined to reform. But I only made myself sick; I was not able to learn to chew tobacco. I learned to smoke fairly well but that did not conciliate anybody and I remained a poor thing and characterless. I long to be respected but I was never able to rise.

Taken from The Autobiography of Mark Twain

Please vote for your selection of Mark Twain's worldview in the poll to the right...

1. To love is to change. (37% of voters)

2. To learn is to grow. (12%)

3. To chaw is to spit.

4. To love is to lose. (50%)

Playing with Dolls

2008-10-19T08:37:00.075-05:00

Born in McComb, Mississippi, Lynne Irene Bridges Spears married at age 20, taught grade school, and with her then husband Jamie Spears, gave birth to three children: Bryan, now 31; Britney, 26; and Jamie Lynn, 17.

Most sources suggest that Lynne Spears was the driving force behind Britney Spears’ early career, citing that she also sold the story of her youngest child’s (Jamie Lynn Spears) pregnancy to OK! magazine for $1 million dollars.

Of interest to Thinkwriter is Lynne Spears’ early memory, found in the new book by Lynne Spears and Lorilee Craker entitled Through the Storm: A Real Story of Fame and Family in a Tabloid World, released on September 16, 2008.

In chapter two, Spears writes, "One of my earliest memories is Sandra (older sister) playing dolls with her friends; I was her living doll to dress and boss, and they had to make do with plain plastic dolls.”

At first glance, Spears' memory may seem like a trifling remembrance of sisters playing dolls with friends; however, keep in mind that an early recollection is never just an engaging story about a person's childhood. Rather, an earliest memory is a window through which the owner, in time and with correct interpretation, can come to know and understand his or her core belief about life.

So. . . of the millions of events and moments Spears might have recalled from her own childhood, she chooses this one memory, and through it, we are able to appreciate how she views her world right now.

Indeed, when we look behind the curtain of Lynne Spears’ early recollection, we find a clear sense of self-appointed exclusivity, as well as sister-induced exploitation, two rather innocent frames of reference for children, though certainly not so forgiving a perspective when collectively embodied by the adult Spears in dealing with her own “dolls.”

Think about it this way: What does a doll give birth to? Well… other dolls of course; other living dolls; playthings to be dressed and undressed, whether for bossing or for pretending someone is the mommy and someone else (with less power) is the baby. Certainly, each of Lynne Spears’ girl “dolls” has been dressed and undressed in the public eye, whether figuratively or literally; used for fun and also for profit…and not only by their mother.

When the world watched, not so long ago, as Britney Spears' disintegrated in a matter of weeks – losing her husband, her hair, her children, and her sanity, many were surely entertained, though some worried about how her increasingly pitiful, yet cartoon-like drama might end. And when Lynne Spears' younger daughter announced she was pregnant, many questioned how her mother could have missed the likelihood of such an outcome. Could it be that a personal filter of make-believe distorts the line between fantasy and reality? (hmmm...) Besides, dolls that are not made of plastic can always be fixed, right? And everything and anything can be made "all better"…. or at the least, artfully reframed to ensure the longer term health of the family business....yes?

In fact, don’t be surprised when Spears’ new book, exposing various intimate details about all the dolls in the Spears’ family, is turned into one of those "highly anticipated" movies. So, let's think about it. Does making a movie about the Spears' various family dramas have an air of exploitation? ....hmmm. Oh, but not to worry... (we hear the author saying...)"It's only a movie!"

I'm a Big Girl Now: Lynne Spears Remembers...

2008-10-11T07:57:00.035-05:00

In the midst of the current financial meltdown and a seemingly never-ending presidential campaign, producers of ABC’s 20/20 actually took time during their October 10, 2008, broadcast to focus on pop star Britney Spears. At the end of a brief story about Spears, co-host Elizabeth Vargas introduced Spears' acclaimed new music video entitled "Womanizer," a provocative music video in which Britney Spears plays numerous parts.

With that in mind, let’s take a look at Britney Spear's mother's early memory – a recollection so telling we can name Lynne Spears’ worldview in a single word.

Lynne Spears remembers…
One of my earliest memories is Sandra (my sister) playing dolls with her friends; I was her living doll to dress and boss, and they had to make do with plain plastic dolls.

In a word, Lynne Spears’ worldview is… (correct answer in red)
1. Accommodate. (30% of voters)
2. Surrender. (10%)
3. Pretend. (50%)
4. Model. (10%)

Please vote for your choice in the poll to the right...and share your thoughts in the comments section by clicking on "comments" following the video. Thank you!

The official video was pulled, but check this out instead.....

An Original Hound Dog: Elvis Presley's Worldview

2008-10-05T16:26:00.058-05:00

Born in Mississippi on January 8, 1935, Elvis Presley was the only child and surviving identical twin born to parents who lived just above the poverty line. As a kid, he stuttered, was occasionally bullied and known as a “well-mannered, quiet child,” despite being “different” and unusually close to his mother.

His early memory originates on October 3, 1945, at the Mississippi-Alabama Fair and Dairy Show Singing Contest, where Elvis wins $5.00 and a free ticket to all the rides at the fair for his rendition of “Old Shep.” He remembers winning fifth place (some sources say second place) in spite of wearing glasses and having no music.

Despite his success, however, and before the natural high he feels for being chosen a winner has come to an end, Elvis is painfully reminded of his own even greater value to his mother, who unabashedly whips him in front of everyone the same day for “[going on] one of the rides." Thus, we find juxtaposed with Elvis's joy of winning the pain of embarrassment for having taken a risk, or perhaps for having strayed too far from the mother ship.

In truth, his mother’s unrelenting love and authority trump any reward he receives at any time in his life. As history records, Elvis was more faithful to his mother than to any other woman he ever knew. He may as well be saying in his early recollection, “My mother keeps me on track. She is always looking after me.” Indeed, after she dies, there is no one to keep him in line for exactly the same “caring” reason. According to those in a position to know, Elvis’s long-time manager, "Colonel" Tom Parker, also looked after Elvis, but he did so primarily to insure Parker's own exceedingly lucrative financial success.

As a teen, Elvis was characterized as “a sad, shy, not especially attractive boy,” unlikely to win any prizes for his guitar playing. He was often made fun of as a “trashy” kind of kid, playing “trashy, hillbilly music.” Other school mates, however, would beg him to sing, but he was evidently too shy to perform. Even after graduation, he scarcely spent a night away from home, yet in his relatively short life, he gained world-wide praise and recognition that endures today, more than thirty years after his death.

To put Elvis Presley’s incredible notoriety in a curiously modern day perspective, we can easily Google Elvis Presley and compare the "results" to other iconic male singer celebrities. “Elvis Presley” receives a whooping 29,900,000 hits on Google versus 3,290,000 for “The Beatles;" 5,870,000 for “Mick Jagger;" and 18,700,000 for “Frank Sinatra.”

Interestingly, and without conscious awareness of it, most fans will recognize, when identified, a certain underlying quality readily demonstrated only by Elvis.

Elvis Presley had the unique ability to project an aura of suffering. It has been suggested, in fact, that without the ambience of suffering , Elvis Presley would have been just another singer. Throughout his life, he seemed to be distracted by something lost, missing, tragic, or unfulfilled, thus presenting to his wide-ranging audience a captivating study in contrasts, not unlike the contrast of joy and pain found in his early memory. Whether it was the loss of something – such as a twin brother, perhaps, or a father’s guidance and strength, for example, or whether it was little more than the ability to appear as the in-need-of-care-bad-boy some women find so irresistible, Presley remained a study in contrasts throughout his career.

He was a white man popularizing black music; a gentle man whose appearance expressed a defiance never matched by his demeanor, as well as a mediocre (at best) actor whose 31 movies made obscene amounts of money regardless the quality of the script or the talent of the lead actor. In addition, he was an incredibly handsome figure with obvious talent, though he never mustered the self-confidence to match his gifts...a paradoxically endearing quality in itself, some might suggest.

As Paul F. Campos, law professor, journalist, and author, has written: “The Elvis cult touches on so many nerves of American popular culture: the ascent of a working class boy from the most obscure backwater to international fame and fortune; the white man with soul of black music in his voice; the performer whose music tied together the main strands of American folk music – country, rhythm and blues, and gospel; and perhaps most compellingly for a weight-obsessed nation, the sexiest man in America’s gradual transformation into a fat, sweating parody of his former self, straining the bounds of a jewel-encrusted bodysuit on a Las Vegas stage. The images of fat Elvis and thin Elvis live together in the popular imagination.”

Thus, we have but one correct choice for Elvis Presley’s worldview: I did it my way. "I stood up there on that stage and just sang - wearing glasses and having no music. . . but I won anyway."

Furthermore, my style of music is unique, but I’m popular anyway. I can’t act, but my movies make big money regardless. I don’t travel, but I’m popular all around the world. I can’t read music, but I originated my own brand of singing just the same. I’m overweight and unhealthy, but woman find me irresistible nonetheless. I have obvious talent, but I’m painfully insecure. And, of course, I am sought after and hounded by throngs of people, but I am never able to rid myself of the loneliness I feel, no matter who I'm with or what I do.

So, I do it my way, because there is no other person even close to being like me; no other singer celebrity with whom I can share my experiences and know full well we are living in the same world. I do it my way, because that is who I am: special, different, sacrificed to my fame, and forever suffering. . . because it feels. . . oh so right.

Love Me Tender...

(I Did It) My Way!

The King Remembers. . .

2008-09-27T07:28:00.016-05:00

My parents entered me in a talent show. I wore glasses, no music, and I won. I think it was 5th place in this state talent contest. I got a whipping the same day…my mother whipped me for something – I don’t know, [going on] one of the rides. Destroyed my ego completely. Elvis, age 10 (Taken from The Rise of Elvis Presley: Last Train to Memphis by Peter Guralnick .)

Elvis Presley's worldview is.... (#2)
1. Don't Be Cruel. (received 37% of the votes)
2. (I Did It) My Way. (50%)
3. (I'm) All Shook Up. (12%)
4. Make the World Go Away. (0%)
Please vote in the poll to the right. Thank you!

Speaker of the House

2008-09-20T21:39:00.030-05:00

Nancy Pelosi writes about power in her recently published book entitled Know Your Power: A Message to America’s Daughters. Reviewed by some 170 readers on Amazon.com (at the time of this post), the overwhelming majority rate the book 1 out of 5 stars, the lowest possible score. In addition, reviewers’ mostly vitriolic comments describe a self-aggrandizing book of inferior quality, lackluster writing style, and turgid content, begging the question: Are these reviews about the book or about the woman? Suffice it to say, Nancy Pelosi is a woman who elicits strong reactions from others. But rather than get caught up in the negative energy often surrounding her, let us discover the worldview that drives her.

And why is it even of interest to know Pelosi’s worldview?

To begin with, she is the politically highest ranking woman in American history.

If the President and Vice President were to lose their lives in a tragic event, for example, Nancy Pelosi, as Speaker of the House, would be sworn in as President of the United States.

In terms of understanding worldview as key to knowing a person’s leadership style, therefore, note that a person’s earliest recollection from childhood expresses the first notes of a melody that by adulthood is fully developed and well-rehearsed. The melody becomes a “song” or attitude that the owner continues to express toward all the experiences of life. Thus, when we understand a person’s practiced refrain, we are able to understand that person in ways more profound than most can imagine.

In her early memory, Nancy is three months from being seven years old. She is traveling with her family to watch her dad take the oath of office for his fifth term in Congress.

As the youngest of six children and the only girl, it is likely that Nancy Pelosi was not simply the focus of her family’s love, attention, and concern, but that she was also seen as a one-of-a-kind treasure, a gift and a blessing by her parents and her siblings. As the solitary female offspring, we can only imagine the throne on which her decidedly Italian family placed her from the second she was born!

And in her uniquely only sister position, she was able to enjoy an up-close and personal relationship with boys and men that few girls are able to experience from a similarly solo position.

By default, Nancy would have learned how to make peace with her brothers and to go along with what the majority wanted. On occasion, she may have colluded with one or more of her brothers to get her way, but always this would have been accomplished without the assistance of a sister to come to her rescue or distract her by offering other avenues for enjoyment. She would have learned how to politic in the purest sense – by learning how to manage her position among five male siblings.

On the other hand, she probably won too easily much of the time, thereby taking the upper hand without a genuine struggle. Sure, being the only girl has its advantages – but the disadvantages include seldom having to really fight for what one wants, and thus never getting to know the stuff one is made of! As an example, despite the persistent whining about Hillary staying the course in the quest for the Democratic nominee for President, Hillary's pushback made Obama a better campaigner. Without struggle, no one even has a chance of reaching his or her full potential.

Whatever the case may be, Nancy was gifted with the opportunity to experience early life in the company of brothers only, a situation that enhanced her knowledge and understanding of the male gender.

Notice, in fact, that in her early memory, she makes reference to her father and shares an interaction with her brothers. Women or girls are never mentioned.

Specifically, Pelosi’s early memory focuses on an incident in which her brothers attempt to include her in their excitement about seeing the Capitol. Initially, she resists their enthusiasm, but they persist. Finally, she asks for specifics: “Is it a capital A, B, or C?”

Recognizing that Nancy is elsewhere focused, her brother Joey physically turns his sister’s head toward what she later describes as “the most amazing sight.”

“I didn’t see the giant letters I expected,” she says. “Instead, I saw this stunning building with a magnificent white dome.”

She never acknowledges mistaking Capitol for capital. Instead, she says, “It was not what I expected,” thus inferring “and that doesn’t make me wrong.”

I saw something instead of what I expected to see – something that was beautiful; something different, but not something I anticipated seeing (perhaps because my brothers didn’t explain it correctly!).

Growing up with competitive boys in the process of becoming men gave Nancy little choice but to stand firm (sort of) in all things, and also to expect that things would often go her way. And today in her role as Speaker of the House, she is often criticized for not doing enough – for not getting more involved in the fight, including taking the risks that winning demands. But as her early memory tells us, she stays in her own world, looking for what she expects to see, anticipating she will be right.

Truth is, Nancy is today the same Speaker of the House she was as a child (when Daddy was “President;” Mom was “Vice President,” and Nancy, “Speaker of the House”), standing out by virtue of gender and birth order rather than because of leadership strength and strategic skill. And now, as Speaker of the House in Washington, nothing much has changed, except maybe the size of the House. She has assumed the power position, but has she come through as a powerful Speaker, one to whom the Presidency could be securely entrusted? You decide.

Nancy with a Capital N

2008-09-12T12:17:00.019-05:00

Overwhelmingly elected by her colleagues in the fall of 2002 as Democratic Leader of the House of Representatives, Nancy Pelosi is the first woman in America to lead a major party in the U.S. Congress. Before being elected Leader, she served as House Democratic Whip for one year and was responsible for the party’s legislative strategy in the House. On January 4, 2007, Pelosi was elected Speaker of the United States House of Representatives.

Nancy Pelosi comes from a family well known for public service. Her father was mayor of Baltimore for 12 years, after serving five terms in Congress. Her brother also served as mayor of Baltimore.

She graduated from Trinity College in D.C. in 1962. She and her husband Paul, a native of San Francisco, have five children and seven grandchildren.

Look over Pelosi’s early memory and select her worldview from the four choices listed below. Please vote in the poll to the right of this post. Be sure to focus on the memory when making your selection and thank you for participating!

Nancy Pelosi remembers….

I’ll never forget the first time I saw the Capitol. It was on a cold January day in 1947, when I was six years old. The occasion was my father’s swearing in ceremony for the fifth term in Congress.

My brothers were excited. As our car approached the Capitol, they kept saying, “Nancy, look at the Capitol.” I said I didn’t see any capitals. They insisted, and finally I asked, “Is it a capital A, B, or C?”

As we drove closer, my brother Joey turned my head toward the most amazing sight. I didn’t see the giant letters I expected. Instead, I saw this stunning building with a magnificent white dome.

Pelosi's worldview is.... (correct answer in red)

1. I try. (38% of voters chose this worldview)
2. I need men to point the way. (chosen by 15%)
3. I’m right. (chosen by 30%)
4. I learn by traveling. (chosen by 15%)

...and just for fun....

Fire Tales by John Mitchell

2008-09-05T21:04:00.018-05:00

So, you do remember the once-upon-a-time-attorney-general John Mitchell . . . yes?

As Richard Nixon’s two-time campaign manager and attorney general from 1969 to 1972, John Newton Mitchell distinguished himself as not only the central figure in the rise and fall of President Richard M. Nixon…but also as the highest ranking American official ever convicted and imprisoned on criminal charges.

On February 21, 1975, Mitchell was convicted of conspiracy, obstruction of justice, and perjury for his role in the Watergate break-in and cover-up and sentenced to two and a half to eight years in prison. He subsequently served 19 months at the minimum security prison at Maxwell Air Force base in Montgomery, Alabama.

But we don’t need the Watergate scandal to confirm Mitchell’s obvious connivery; we have only to peruse his completely transparent early memories to establish that he had a clear preference for the dark side.

Even a quick reading of Mitchell’s early memories reveals their obvious and telling commonalities. In the first memory, Mitchell is fire’s consort; and in the second, fire’s creator; thus, both involve partnership with fire . . . the devil’s only friend. Both memories also suggest Mitchell's real joy in doing what he “shouldn’t” (throw school books in the fire and light sparklers before nightfall), and both suggest an absence of any real consequence to him for doing wrong.

But even more illuminating is Mitchell’s joy in telling the two memories. He remains prideful, boastful, and abundantly pleased throughout his delivery. With unabashed laughter and enjoyment, he represents himself as oh-so-clever to be getting-one-over on the “authority” – including the authority of "society," as represented by the old wooden school in the first memory, and the the authority of the "family," as represented by the family home in the second memory.

And the underlying message? I don’t like to have to submit to authority. Therefore, by eradicating the authority (school), I take control as the authority. I also don’t like to follow the rules (imposed by family); therefore, I do what I want when I want to do it, regardless the consequences. And, by the way, I seek a dark place to have my way; I go down under to have my fun.

Keep in mind, of course, Mitchell is telling these memories when he is an adult. He is speaking about himself as he is now and going forward. Without realizing it, he is telling us how he remembers his future…how he views his world. Remarkably, his life story validates the truth of his worldview: I am the devil’s advocate.

Of course, the real boomerang in Mitchell’s fire tales is that he apparently fabricated some or all of each memory. He could have put himself in any light, even a positive one; yet he chose to frame himself as a fire encourager and a fire starter. In truth, if Nixon were the devil, then Mitchell did Nixon’s bidding...(and was aptly rewarded by fire).

Beware the language in the following audio, but do listen for Nixon's comments about John Mitchell (boo yeow!).

Remember John Mitchell: Law and Order Man?

2008-08-24T20:11:00.019-05:00

John Newton Mitchell (1913 – 1988) was inarguably the most powerful person in the Nixon cabinet. Mitchell and Nixon first met in 1967 when their respective law firms merged. Friends by ‘68, Nixon persuaded Mitchell to manage his 1968 bid for the U.S. presidency.

Once elected, Nixon rewarded the superbly organized Mitchell by appointing him attorney general, a position Mitchell reluctantly accepted and then held from 1969 to 1972.

Mitchell resigned in 1972 to manage President Nixon’s triumphant reelection campaign. At that point, of course, Mitchell’s biography takes an even more dramatic turn… (but more about that in the next post).

In the meantime, please peruse Mitchell’s two early memories and select what you predict is his worldview. Cast your vote in the poll to the right, and, as always, thank you for voting!

When interviewed about his childhood, John Mitchell begins by saying his was a "normal" childhood, "like Huck Finn,” he says, filled with playing all the sports: baseball, hockey, golf, hunting, fishing, and sailing…and “mischief.” As he speaks, Mitchell begins laughing to himself about a specific memory from childhood involving his “old wooden school.” As he recounts the memory, Mitchell’s laughter becomes so robust that he has trouble finishing his story!

(1.) “One night a fire burned the school clear down to the ground. Whole damned school went. My brother and I were there, and we watched it. We were so damned glad to see that thing burn down. We watched it! We threw our books into the fire. We were so glad. We just threw out books in. My father gave us a good whack. I’ll always remember that. Whew!”

Telling the school memory prompts Mitchell to tell a second childhood memory.

(2.) “You know, I burned down the house in Blue Point. It was one Fourth of July. We had sparklers, and it was daylight and, you know, we were supposed to wait until after dark. Well, I was a kid who didn’t want to wait, so I took some of those sparklers down under the porch and – well, it burned down the house.”

Although these two memories clearly reveal Mitchell’s worldview, something even more interesting makes them doubly valuable: They aren’t true.

According to others in a position to know, the first story is complete fiction in terms of Mitchell's involvement, and the second only slightly authentic in that a few leaves supposedly catch fire from Mitchell's lit sparklers, but an adult standing nearby douses out the tiny flame with a pail of water. The house never burns down – nor the porch. (Both memories are taken from The Strong Man by James Rosen, copyright 2008.)

Because Mitchell makes them up, these two memories are even more compelling… and more telling.

With all of this in mind, what is John Mitchell’s worldview? (Correct answer in red.)
1. I am the devil’s advocate. (42%)
2. I am above the standard. (42%)
3. I can cheat. (14%)
4. Nice guys are never rewarded. (0%)

Five Sets of Fingerprints

2008-08-15T21:05:00.035-05:00

(1.) Denzel Washington
One time when I was a child I thought I saw an angel. I woke up one night, and it had wings and kinda looked like my sister. I walked over to the door and opened the door so some light could come into the room, and it sort of faded away. I asked my mother about it, and she said it was probably my Guardian Angel. So I’ve always felt protected. It was as real as you are in front of me now; that’s the God’s honest truth. (Washington's worldview: "I'm covered.")

(2.) Donald Trump (Video above clearly demonstrates Trump's childhood fingerprint on his current business practice - [especially beginning about midway into the video].) As a kid, I was making a building with blocks in our playroom. I didn’t have enough. So I asked my younger brother, Robert, if I could borrow some of his. He said, “Okay, but you have to give them back when you’re done.” I used all of my blocks, then all of his blocks, and when I was done I had a great building, which I then glued together. Robert never did get those blocks back. (Trump's worldview: "I got mine... and I got yours too.")

(3.) Tiger Woods
I remember when I was about four years old, and I played in a pitch, putt and drive for little peewees. It was a 10-and-under deal, and I finished 2nd. I just remember the trophy being as tall as me. I thought it was the coolest thing ever that you’d get a prize that was as tall as you and big as you. (To revisit video on Tiger Woods, please see previous post.) (Woods' worldview: "My talent is bigger than life.")

(4.) Tom Cruise
My father took me on a two-hour drive to go skiing in the hills outside Ottawa. I was hungry, and he refused to stop to let me buy a snack. He told me to eat imaginary food. We then spent a long time making and then eating a make-believe sandwich, complete with soda and chips. (Cruise's worlview: "I make something out of nothing.")

(5.) Steven Spielberg
My dad took me out to see a meteor shower when I was a little kid, and it was scary for me because he woke me up in the middle of the night. My heart was beating; I didn’t know what he wanted to do. He wouldn’t tell me, and he put me in the car and we went off, and I saw all these people lying on blankets, looking up at the sky. And my dad spread out a blanket. We lay down and looked at the sky, and I saw for the first time all these meteors. But what didn’t scare me, but was very soothing, was watching this cosmic meteor shower. And I think from that moment on, I never looked at the sky and thought it was a bad place. (Spielberg's worldview: "I can take you into the action and out of your world.")

FIVE BOYS: Spielberg, Washington, Cruise, Woods, and Trump

2008-08-08T14:46:00.032-05:00

Okay... an earliest memory is as characteristic for the owner as the sound of that person's voice and the shape of his or her handwriting! If you doubt it, look at the five memories below and see how easily you can match each with its owner. Make your selections by using the polls to the right of this post (note: Polls are now closed. Bloggers correctly matched Donald Trump and Tiger Woods with their earliest memories; however, not everyone was able to correctly match the other three memories to their rightful owners - but good try and thanks for voting!). Start with the obvious matches and then use what you know to figure out the rest. And guess what? Your earliest memories are just as telling.

(1.) One time when I was a child I thought I saw an angel. I woke up one night, and it had wings and kinda looked like my sister. I walked over to the door and opened the door so some light could come into the room, and it sort of faded away. I asked my mother about it, and she said it was probably my Guardian Angel. So I’ve always felt protected. It was as real as you are in front of me now; that’s the God’s honest truth.

(2.) As a kid, I was making a building with blocks in our playroom. I didn’t have enough. So I asked my younger brother, Robert, if I could borrow some of his. He said, “Okay, but you have to give them back when you’re done.” I used all of my blocks, then all of his blocks, and when I was done I had a great building, which I then glued together. Robert never did get those blocks back.

(3.) I remember when I was about four years old, and I played in a pitch, putt and drive for little peewees. It was a 10-and-under deal, and I finished 2nd. I just remember the trophy being as tall as me. I thought it was the coolest thing ever that you’d get a prize that was as tall as you and big as you.

(4.) My father took me on a two-hour drive to go skiing in the hills outside Ottawa. I was hungry, and he refused to stop to let me buy a snack. He told me to eat imaginary food. We then spent a long time making and then eating a make-believe sandwich, complete with soda and chips.

(5.) My dad took me out to see a meteor shower when I was a little kid, and it was scary for me because he woke me up in the middle of the night. My heart was beating; I didn’t know what he wanted to do. He wouldn’t tell me, and he put me in the car and we went off, and I saw all these people lying on blankets, looking up at the sky. And my dad spread out a blanket. We lay down and looked at the sky, and I saw for the first time all these meteors. But what didn’t scare me, but was very soothing, was watching this cosmic meteor shower. And I think from that moment on, I never looked at the sky and thought it was a bad place.

Benjamin Franklin: Gift to America

2008-08-03T08:47:00.043-05:00

As historians verify, Benjamin Franklin was a celebrated genius. Even as a young man, he grasped that he was quicker of mind and more lucid of pen than almost everyone he met. . .and he never hesitated to use his intellect to improve the world – not because doing good was his particular mission, but because he was passionately driven by curiosity and remarkably gifted with an eye for the laws of nature.

In time, he applied his scientific style of reasoning, which was experimental and pragmatic, not just to nature but also to public affairs.

Franklin’s ensuing achievements as a writer, statesman, scientist, inventor, entrepreneur, philanthropist, diplomat, business strategist, political thinker, and Founding Father are too many and too immense to discuss here, but we will bring to light Franklin’s worldview, the very energy that propelled his incredibly rich and productive life. For this task, we go straight to Franklin’s earliest memories.

In the first memory, a pocketful of unearned money, coupled with the fascination of another boy’s whistle, compel Franklin to negotiate a poor man’s trade. Franklin naively gives everything he has for the pleasure of instant ownership, thereby exchanging future [buying] power for short-lived gratification. Even so, the humiliation and self-recrimination he soon suffers awards Franklin a lifelong lesson: Never pay too much for the whistle. . .a maxim lost on many a brilliant person throughout history, including Bill Clinton and others who have paid too much for a fleeting indulgence.

The difference between Franklin and so many others is that by way of his mistake, Franklin becomes empowered. Realizing that man’s desire for pleasure overtakes reason, Franklin vows to observe the foolishness of others who “pay too much for the whistle” and to find himself never again mirrored by such a crushing regret.

In the second memory, Franklin is charmed not by wind blown through a whistle but by wind blown across the pond. Observing an opportunity to join forces with nature, Franklin aligns himself with the breath of life and is carried across the pond with no fatigue and the greatest of pleasure, yet a second real life lesson he will forever use.

Franklin’s single expense is time spent convincing another lad to take his (Franklin's) belongings around to the other side of the pond, a harmless exploit easily accomplished by one already skilled in identifying those most susceptible to persuasion. In consorting with nature all around, Franklin gives himself a gratifying experience. He observes; acts quickly; and stealthily places himself in concert with the wind.

And throughout his life, Franklin continues to find himself in concert with the wind. With wit and wisdom, he naturally pushes the wheel of development forward. In so many ways, he is the right man at the right time. America was herself a force of nature and Franklin well-equipped, both intellectually and personally, to ride the tide of history.

Of special note is that Franklin cared little for the why of nature’s laws; he was all about the what and the how. He said, “[It is not] much importance to us to know the manner in which nature executes her laws; it is enough if we know the laws themselves. It is of real use to know that china left in the air unsupported will fall and break; but how it comes to fall and why it breaks are matters of speculation. It is a pleasure indeed to know them, but we can preserve our china without it.”

By partnering with the laws of nature as they apply both to the environment and to all of humankind, Benjamin Franklin made progress look easy.

NOTE: What follows is a relatively lengthy but engaging video presentation featuring Walter Isaacson, author of Benjamin Franklin: An American Life. Enjoy when you have the time!

Ben Franklin: Paying Attention at Age Seven

2008-07-26T08:44:00.027-05:00

Now seems the opportune time to look at one of our most celebrated statesmen. What follows are two earliest memories from the amazing Benjamin Franklin. Make your selection of his worldview from the list below the memories, and please vote in the poll to the right of the post. Thank you for participating!

(1.) When I was a child of seven years old, my friends on a holiday filled my little pocket with half-pence. I went directly to a shop where they sold toys for children, and being charmed with the sound of a whistle that I met by the way, in the hands of another boy, I voluntarily offered and gave all my money for it. When I came home, whistling all over the house, much pleased with my whistle, but disturbing all the family, my brothers, sisters, and cousins, understanding the bargain I had made, told me I had given four times as much for it as it was worth, put me in mind of what good things I might have bought with the rest of the money, and laughed at me so much for my folly that I cried with vexation; and the reflection gave me more chagrin than the whistle gave me pleasure.

As I came into the world, and observed the actions of men, I thought I met many who gave too much for the whistle. (taken from H.W. Brands' biography of Benjamin Franklin)

(2.) Kites, as Franklin would later famously show, could also be useful. Sending one aloft, he stripped, waded into a pond, floated on his back, and let it pull him. “Having then engaged another boy to carry my clothes around the pond,” he recalled, “I began to cross the pond with my kite, which carried me quite over without the least fatigue and with the greatest of pleasure imaginable.” (taken from Walter Isaacson's biography of Benjamin Franklin)

What is Franklin's worldview? (correct answer in red)

1. I consort with nature. (29% of voters selected #1)
2. I ride the wind. (0%)
3. I whistle at opportunity. (23% of voters selected #3)
4. I harness pleasure. (47% of voters selected #4)

Sarah Jessica Parker: Playing the Edge

2008-07-18T20:21:00.045-05:00

Sarah Jessica Parker, best known for her role as Carrie Bradshaw on Sex and the City, was born in Ohio and grew-up with her mother and stepfather and seven siblings. She is the fourth born and second daughter.

Although the family is claimed to have struggled financially, Parker was trained in singing and ballet as a youngster and began acting by age eight . . . a feat not easily accomplished without some resource. Nevertheless, the more intriguing “deficiency” in Parker’s life relates to her reputation. Remarkably, Sarah Jessica Parker has remained scandal-free for over 35 years!

And how has she achieved such a satisfying outcome? As one might imagine, Parker’s earliest memories give us the inside story.

In memory #1, Parker recalls a time when she tries to be someone else (a man), and she gets hurt. She remembers attempting to use a straight razor (a manly man’s cutting edge), thinking the idea of shaving is “cool.” Perhaps she is imitating her father or her step-father-to-be, but regrettably, she “slit[s]" her face open.

“I was always in trouble,” she laments. In other words, when I forget my place as a woman and start imagining I am above it all (a man: someone I am not), I lose face.

In memory #2, we find Parker needing a rescue, lest she be “snowed” by her own circumstances. How often do we see young actors mesmerized by their own celebrity? Likewise, Parker remembers being “disoriented while in a snow tunnel built by my brothers and sister (her contemporaries; i.e., the modern world).” Her mother pulls her out, thereby bringing her back to reality.

And today isn’t it apparent that Parker is not easily “snowed” by rave reviews or others’ opinions of who she is or what she “should “do? She seems to keep her own wise counsel.

And via memory #3, Parker imagines a straightforward warning. Just as her mother is taking a knife away from her, Parker utters her first word: dangerous . . . as if to say: “Watch out! At any moment, I can get cut up or cut out!”

And furthermore. . . “I best not make a wrong move or say the wrong thing, lest I be excised out of my own life, or my career, as I want it to be.”

You may notice that Parker’s self-induced caution is evidenced during on-camera interviews. She often seems to be mentally rehearsing every word before answering, as if fearing she will misspeak.

In fact, in all three memories, Parker recalls a near miss and some degree of pain or disappointment. And to what end? The answer is clear: To make and keep life good, Parker plays the edge – as remembered by the razor’s edge lest she lose face; nature’s edge lest she “get snowed;” and the knife’s edge, lest she find herself cut up in the press or cut out of a career or the next best deal.

And finally, when it comes to entertainment, we know that talent is time-sensitive and fragile, a precious commodity that must be well managed to stay electrifying and in demand. In Parker’s case, this is particularly true. Unlike certain actors and entertainers said to have a “deep bench” – meaning broad talent and innumerable "assets," promising a long and varied career . . . such is not the guarantee for Parker.

Although sexy, classy, and clever, Parker is not a Nicole Kidman or Merle Streep, for example. She is, as some would say, “thin on the bench,” and thus her unique and most nuanced skills must be carefully and cleverly considered.

Simply stated . . . if not for playing the edge, Sarah Jessica Parker becomes just another actor; but by playing the edge, Parker at 43 is able to produce and star in one of the most anticipated and, ultimately, successful movies of the year, while other more beautiful and more gifted actors are still looking for work.

So. . . you bet Parker takes chances, but she's smart about it. She accepted the role as Carrie, but demanded a no-nudity clause. She knows she is a respected fashion icon but chose to wear a really unflattering hat to the London premier of Sex and the City.

Paradoxically, Parker’s edgy hat lifted her above the other actors at the premiere, proving once again she knows how to use her head. Although the shortest performer appearing on the red carpet that evening, she seemed the tallest and over time will remain the brand's most memorable.

Sarah Jessica Parker: Three Earliest Memories

2008-07-10T21:52:00.013-05:00

(1.) Around age two, I recall attempting to shave with a straight razor. I remember being fascinated by it, thinking that the idea of shaving was cool. So, one day I tried it, and I slit my face open. I was always in trouble.

(2.) When I was two years old, I remember I had to be rescued by my mother after becoming disoriented while inside a snow tunnel that had been built by my brothers and sister.

(3.) The first word I ever spoke was “dangerous.” I was in the kitchen with Mother and picked up a knife. When my mother took it away from me, I said “dangerous.”

Sarah Jessica Parker’s worldview is… (including poll results)
1. Mothers know best. (0%)
2. Trouble works for me. (7%)
3. I play the edge. (78%)
4. Life can hurt you. (14%)

The Apple and the Tree: Finding Tim Russert's Core

2008-07-04T22:11:00.024-05:00

Tim Russert’s death is yet another reminder that good things don’t last forever. Imagine the countless political enthusiasts waiting to hear Russert’s take on the November 2008 election! His untimely death was a jolt, if even for the fact that we had already put Russert’s presence in our future.

And why wouldn’t we? Russert had become as dependable as knowing the television would work with a push of the button… always there on Sunday morning, always prepared, always seeming to be right, and always looking mildly agitated, or maybe over-focused on his goals for that morning. Indeed, getting at the real story had been pushing Tim Russert since he was five or six years old – about 52 to 53 years!

Little Tim Russert sees history on his dad’s back, and that intriguing book cover makes him want more. Mom gives him a final piece of the story's dénouement, but without the build-up and the climax, including all the details pertaining to his father, the plot is just too big to put together…especially for a kindergartener!

And let’s remember, scars open up the imagination. Consider the enthusiasm of a 5 or 6 year old. A plane crash is already larger-than-life, and to think that it involves my “everyday dad”…and he survived the crash?! Wow! Well now... that changes everything!

Who is this person I call Dad, after all? What else is there about Daddy I don’t know? Why did his plane crash? What happened? How did Daddy survive? What or who saved him? What is he hiding? The questions are endless.

And here’s the challenge for all of us. When something traumatic happens to people we know, including ourselves, and we are unable to get the whole story right away, we instinctively make up the particulars we don’t have. We embellish, we theorize, we create the missing details effortlessly. In fact, this is how gossip originates. We don’t have the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so we hypothesize the most plausible truth from our particular frame of reference. We’d rather fabricate the details than leave blank spaces unaccounted for.

Thus, to regain control of his imagination, Tim had to get the real story about his dad. In fact, scars and the idea of a plane crash now make Dad so much more interesting.

But then Dad swims away…hoping to leave the details in the past.

As the parachute rigger, Russert’s dad undoubtedly carried considerable guilt with him after the crash, not only because he was a survivor (survivor’s guilt), but also because the rigger, charged with packing, maintaining, and repairing parachutes, has to be focused on survival at all times. Inevitably, even if illogical, the senior Russert would have consciously or unconsciously questioned his personal responsibility with regard to the outcome of each and every soldier involved in the crash. When Big Russ swims away from his son’s questions, he is doing what people do who hold on to painful secrets: They avoid talking about them…similar, in many ways, to guests who appear on Meet the Press.

Many guests on Meet the Press surely want to swim away from their past, but just like Russet’s memory in which his dad finally shares the article describing the crash of a B-24 Liberator, Russert finds article after article, quote after quote, holding each and every Meet the Press guest to a high standard of integrity regarding their views, goals, ideas, and previous actions.

The patience Russert develops as a child in his efforts to obtain information about his dad’s plane crash was evidenced every week on Meet the Press. Russert systematically and strategically threaded together a guest’s purported versus previous point of view, thus delivering to his viewing public not just a news program, but a dynamic and thought-provoking news event.

Yes, Tim Russert, like his father, was completely willing to collect and unload people’s garbage to get his job done. And whereas Russert’s dad ran into the water to avoid revealing his emotions, Russert pushed his Meet the Press guests until feelings came to the surface – as evidenced by participants’ body language, particularly their finger pointing. As one who was seeking to know, Russert never hesitated to display the compost of a guest’s pertinent past, thereby assuring equal airtime for every incongruity.

Tim Russert admired his father, the garbage collector, and in one unexpected way, Russert grew up to be just like him.

Crash "Seen:" Tim Russert's Early Memory

2008-06-26T21:29:00.013-05:00

Every summer, our family used to rent a cottage for a week at Wasaga Beach in Ontario, where Dad, a strong man who loved the water, used to let my sisters and me lie on his back while he swam. One morning, when I was five or six, we were on the beach in our bathing suits when I noticed that Dad had several scars on his back. I had probably seen them before, but this was the first time I really noticed them.

When I asked Mom why they were there, she told me that Dad had been injured in a plane crash during the war. So, of course I went over and asked him, “Dad, were you really in a plane crash?’

“Yeah,” he said, but the word was barely out of his mouth before he jumped back in the water. Even at that age, I could see that he was running away – or in this case, actually swimming away – from my questions.

As the years went on, especially on Memorial Day, when we went to the local cemetery to plant little American flags on the graves of war veterans, I sometimes asked him about the war. Although I desperately wanted to know what happened, I was careful not to push too hard. It was clear that he didn’t want to talk about it, and I imagined that I might feel the same way if something that terrible happened to me. Every time I asked about the war, he would parcel out another detail or two. One year he said, “Everybody did their job, and I did mine. I was a parachute rigger.” Another time, referring to the crash, he said, “It was a foggy day, really bad weather.”

When I was in high school, the two of us were in the basement one day when Dad walked over to his desk, opened a drawer, and took out a manila folder. He handed me a yellowed clipping for the October 24, 1944, edition of the Southport Weekly, an English newspaper. The headline read US BOMBER CRASHES IN FLAMES AT AINSDALE, and the article described the crash of a B-24 Liberator at an air base in England. I read it quickly and zeroed in on the key lines: “The plane, which had been circling around as though preparatory to landing…somersaulting into a field, immediately bursting into flames. When the place crashed it broke up, and some of the air men were thrown clear.”

Dad, I realized, had been one of them.

Tim Russert’s worldview is…
1. I seek fame.
2. I seek to know. (100%)
3. I seek to teach.
4. I seek to entertain.

INSPI(RED) BY BONO

2008-06-21T22:23:00.040-05:00

Paul David Hewson (aka BONO), musician, singer-songwriter, activist, philanthropist, and main vocalist of the Irish rock band U2, was born and reared in Dublin, Ireland, in the sixties. A review of Bono’s six earliest memories reveals his activist’s roots – even to the extent of pinpointing when it all began. (note: see the previous post, entitled BOY BONO to read the memories on which the following commentary is based.)

Briefly, Memory #1 is like a singular Cliff Note for Bono’s entire life. Here he describes himself as a screaming child from the time he was born, because of something "to do with my heart." Yes! … and now he is singing about, and speaking out about (and also taking action about) the causes, ideals, and principles that ignite his passion (his heart) and capture his attention, his enthusiasm, and his resources toward making a difference.

Memory #2 is a pivotal memory; because it represents the day he stopped screaming and started taking action….started correcting an ill. He recalls not tolerating a bully who “bit his [friend’s] ear,” that most critical of body parts for a musician.

Memory #3 contains a symbolic picture of one who hangs himself out on the ledge for his beliefs…calling out to his mates below, damning his father, the “absolute ass” who got it all wrong (i.e., the authority figure who gets it all wrong).

Memories #4 gives us a picture of Bono’s dad seeming to be on stage – standing at the top of the stairs screaming (much like U2) while Bono and is mother take the role of audience members. Bono is fascinated by the dramatic event, and his mother, laughing hysterically, is completely amused, despite being aware of her husband’s pain (...similar to the global audience witnessing pain around the world, yet ignoring it).

Memory #5 reveals his mother to be one who gave Bono license to do whatever he wanted.

And finally, Memory #6 shows us that Bono does not like to stand still (i.e., do nothing, be apathetic, ignore an injustice, etc.). In this recollection, he takes the rap for his eleven-year-old brother, the only one tall enough to have taken the leopard now missing from the mantel. Bono, at three, recalls his indignation at being blamed...and he doesn’t like it (or like being pictured that way either).

In Bono, we have an extremely talented, principled-driven activist who continues to use his enormous talent to step on an even larger stage than the one he shares with U2 …in order to raise awareness about third-world debt and the plight of Africa, including the AIDS pandemic. As one of the world’s most well-known philanthropic performers, Bono’s worldview certainly is I have something to say... and, of course, the most authentic way...in fact, the only indisputable way "to say something" is with one's behavior.

BOY BONO

2008-06-14T13:37:00.030-05:00

Known by his stage name Bono (pronounced BAH’-NOH, meaning good voice), Paul David Hewson, born May 10, 1960, is the lead singer for the Irish rock band U2. Of course, a person does not have to be interested in U2 to become fascinated by Bono and his work (but more about that in the next post). In the meantime, see if you can determine Bono’s worldview by looking over his early memories reproduced here. Take a good look and then choose the worldview that fits him best from the list at the end of this post. Enjoy!

Memory #1. “I have a vague memory of being in the hospital, aged three, for tests to find out what was wrong with the screaming child (I cried from the day I was born). It was a strange thing; they seemed to think it might be something to do with my heart.”

Memory #2. “The crying stopped on the first day I went to school. I remember that day. A boy came up to my new best mate, James Mahon, and bit his ear, and I took that kid’s head and banged it on some iron railings. It is terrible, but that is the sort of thing I remember.”

Memory #3. “I have a memory of one particular row with my father, and he locked me in the box-room (a tiny room about the size of a cupboard). So I went up; I pulled up the blind, opened the window, and I was sitting on the window sill with my feet out, talking to my mates who were down the street below. I was telling them what an absolute ass my father was and suddenly they fell very quiet. The old man was standing right behind me listening to my abuse, yards and yards of expletives, cruel descriptions all now on his record. As I think about it now, he had a lot to put up with.”

Memory #4. “My father used to make things. He was good at DIY (do-it-yourself projects) and he’d be building presses and wardrobes and whatever. I remember he was upstairs in the bedroom, and he was using an electric drill and there was a scream, a wild, mad sound. Mother and I ran out to the bottom of the stairs and we looked up. My dad had been drilling a piece of wood while holding it between his legs and the electric drill had slipped out of the wood and gone right into his crotch. He was standing and holding it with the ‘I’ve castrated myself’ kind of look on his face, and I remember my mother literally crying with laughter. At that point, of course, we didn’t know if he had castrated himself or not, but as serious as she must have known it was, she couldn’t stop laughing. She had a real dark sense of humor.”

Memory #5. “I remember my mother chasing me with a wooden cane after I had done something bad. I was running away from her, terrified, but when I looked around I saw her laughing her head off. She couldn’t take discipline that seriously.”

Memory #6. “I remember having a photograph taken with my brother, Norman (who is eight years older than me) and not liking it. I was around three years old. We had two little china leopards standing as ornaments on the mantel and at the end of the session, there was only one leopard left, and I was put away for that!"
(All 6 memories are taken from the 2006 book entitled U2 by U2, written by U2 and Neil McCormick.)

Please select Bono's worldview from the following 4 and cast your vote in the poll to the right. Thank you for participating! (Note: The Bono poll is now closed. Results by percentage of votes are listed below.)

The correct answer is...
1. I have something to say. (100%) ...wow!!
2. I scream the pain away.
3. Women are music.
4. Men make noise.

From a Peacock to a Chipper

2008-06-12T07:16:00.023-05:00

A pioneer in the land of nonfiction television, Barbara Walters seems always to be reminding people to remind people that she is the first to break the network news glass ceiling. “And here’s the thing:” We’ve continued watching her, not because she is necessarily the most insightful or the most compelling journalist, but because she is the one asking the questions. She has amplified her television presence by showcasing some of the world’s most fascinating personalities – the ones we want to see. We watch her...to watch them.

Yes…Barbara Walters is a master at managing the limelight, as her memories attest.

In Walters’ earliest recollections, we are struck by a rather remarkable pattern and theme in regards to the way she sees her world. In all three recollections, the narrative pattern is the same. She initially has us going in one direction, and then, boom... we are turned right around toward an unforeseen, yet positive outcome…for Barbara Walters.

For example, in the first memory, we find seven-year-old Barbara convalescing alone and friendless in her hospital room, even closing her eyes to the company of perhaps a dutiful nurse entering the room to check on her. Only later does she discover the intruder was her own mother, unexpectedly (or maybe not) bringing Barbara’s favorite doll to the hospital to keep her company. Alas, even with eyes closed, Barbara still gets rewarded.

In the second memory, we see Barbara wanting to please her mother with a gift – a feat heretofore never accomplished by her father. In the beginning, Barbara’s gift-giving experience seems headed toward a similarly disappointing outcome, when, incredibly, an unexpected (or maybe not) finale has her being appreciated in spades! Her mother not only applauds Barbara’s gift, but she also dumps her entire collection of perfume bottles to make the point. Alas, even when she chooses wrong, Barbara still gets rewarded.

In the third and final memory, Barbara is unexpectedly (or maybe not) dreading the idea of performing as the lead robin in a school event, most probably after trying on the homemade costume with the “big red belly” where a lovely red-breast was supposed to be. With support from her mother (the "costume" maker!), Barbara renounces the lead role and becomes “a chipper in the chorus like everyone else.” Apparently blind to the idea (or maybe not) that someone else might benefit from her mother’s handiwork, Barbara and her mother dispose of the costume by tearing it up! Alas, even with a broken commitment and no appeasement, Barbara still gets rewarded.

Thus, no matter how things look at the onset, Barbara Walters holds in her mind’s eye the expectation of a good outcome. These are the memories she consciously and unconsciously rehearses over her lifetime….memories that remind her she knows how to work it, how to get rewarded, and how to manage authority to her advantage.

Note also that in Barbara’s worldview, there is no end game, as “I get my way” would suggest. Getting one’s way implies a contest with a finish line and obligatory winners and losers. She simply “wins” by being and by showing up first.

Now, if we were to wonder how she manages (both now and as a child) to work it so well, we might refer back to her memories for clues. For example, might Barbara have mentioned to her mother how much she missed and wanted her favorite doll? Most likely, yes. The expression “It makes me so sad for her” suggests Barbara knew exactly how tirelessly her mother would work to deliver the doll to her bedside once Barbara let her mother know she wanted it.

And in the second memory, might Barbara have signaled to her mother (with an uncharacteristically sad and forlorn expression and maybe a tear puddling in the eye) that surprising her mother with the appropriate Christmas gift meant the world to her? Again, the answer is yes. In fact, to diminish her own guilt for nearly crushing Barbara’s feelings, her mother denounces every other perfume bottle she owns!

And finally, might Walters have remained the lead robin in the performance if the costume her mother made had sported a more appealing red-breast, as opposed to a big red belly, as she describes it? Again, probably yes.

Quoting from http://www.thinkwriting.com/ … “Memories are windows we look through to see where we are and where we are going.” It is interesting to observe that Barbara Walters, now nearly 79 years old (9/25/29), has been portrayed as a straight-up, no-nonsense reporter for almost fifty years. Or put another way: She has been playing the “lead robin” in a litany of news performances for most of her professional life. As a “red-breasted” and energetic newswoman, she has made her mark (and her money, though maybe not enough until now), year after year after year.

However, what once had great appeal is now more of a big red belly situation. “But here’s the thing: I didn’t want to be the star,” Walters says (or maybe it's…"I didn’t want to be the star anymore" ...i.e., under the condition that I would have to wear a goofy costume my mother made, or under the condition I would have to leave real money on the table in a book contract negotiation when telling a special secret would garner me a much bigger signing bonus.).

So, to take herself off the pedestal (off the “respected/respectable” pedestal, as it were), Walters discloses a once taboo liaison with a married-at-the-time United States senator, in effect, tearing up her image as the straight-laced, venerable professional, in exchange for becoming “a chipper in the chorus …just like all the other kids” …or at least like all the other wealthy kids.

And in case she has a moment’s hesitation about giving up the senator, Walters will reflect on her earliest memories as a reminder that she never fails to work things to her advantage.

So, if you’re worried about her wanton disclosure, fret not. Even when she makes a wrong decision (like tearing up her own reputation), Barbara Walters has not done so unrewarded. As evidenced by her worldview, she knows how to work it.
(To read the early memories referenced in this post, see Mommy dearest: Barbara's Earliest Memories, dated Friday, June 6, 2008.)

Mommy...dearest: Barbara's Early Memories

2008-06-06T20:34:00.040-05:00

We think we recognize someone when she has come into our living room for so many years, but you guessed it....there's always more than meets the eye. To see Barbara Walters through a Thinkwriter's lens, start by perusing her earliest memories* and then select the worldview you think fits her best. Four possibilities are listed at the end of this post and a poll is in the right hand column. Please cast your vote and thank you for participating!

(#1) When I was in the hospital [age 7 or 8] recovering from the operation [appendectomy], which in those days kept you in the hospital for almost a week, my mother would take the streetcar back and forth from Brookline to Boston every day to see me. She had to then walk a good ten blocks to the hospital. One night I heard someone entering my room and, thinking it was the nurse, whom I didn’t want to see, I kept my eyes closed. When the person left the room, I finally opened my eyes and saw at the foot of my bed my favorite doll. My mother, worried that I would feel alone, had taken the streetcar at night to visit me one more time. The memory has stayed with me all these years. I can barely write about it even today. It makes me so sad for her.

(#2) One Christmas I remember saving money to buy my mother a cut-glass perfume bottle, which many women kept on their dressing tables. My mother had a considerable collection, and I was sure she would want to keep adding to it. I carefully chose what I thought was the perfect one, chiseled in the shape of a half-moon. I wanted my mother to love it and not want to return it, as she did so many of my father’s gifts. She returned his presents so often that he stopped buying anything for her. I have kept this lesson in mind all my life. No matter what anybody gives me as a gift, I say, “Terrific,” and wear it at least twice (before trying to return it).
The day before Christmas, unable to keep my secret totally to myself, I asked my mother if she would like another bottle for her collection. “Not really,” she said. “I have too many already.” I could barely keep back the tears, but it was too late. The next morning I gave her my shiny wrapped present. She opened it, took me in her arms, and exclaimed, “Of all my perfume bottles, this is the most beautiful. It makes all the others look dreadful. I am going to give them all away and only keep this one.” And she did.

(#3) When I was about seven years old, the school put on a little performance for adoring parents. It featured a robin red-breast as the lead and a chorus of little brown-costumed chippers. I was assigned the leading role of the robin. But here’s the thing: I didn’t want to be the star. I wanted to be in the chorus, to be like all the other kids. So to this day I recall going home and watching my mother, who sewed very well, cheerfully making my robin costume. I tried it on, with its big gorgeous red belly, spread my wings, and burst into tears. When I told my mother why, she came to school with me the next day and explained the situation to the bewildered teacher. My mother and I went home, tore up the costume, and I became a chipper in the chorus like everyone else.

Cast your vote for Barbara Walters’ worldview in the poll to the right. (Note: This poll is now closed; voters' selections are listed in percentages. The correct answer is #2.)
1. Mothers rule. (15%)
2. I work it. (61%)
3. I deserve presents. (0)
4. I get my way. (23%)

*All three memories are from Barbara Walters' memoir, entitled Audition (2008).

If I Think It, I Say It!

2008-05-31T15:05:00.056-05:00

Although Simon Cowell, Roseanne Bar, Don Rickles, and Joan Rivers are all outspoken and totally opinionated, only one owns the comments on the previous Thinkwriter post entitled “Out of the Mouths of Babes.” That distinction belongs to the so-called “meanest judge” on American’s most popular singing talent show, American Idol, which has recently completing its 7th successful season.

American Idol judge Simon Cowell says about himself: “From an early age, I was very, very bad.”

Confirming Cowell’s negative self-appraisal are family members who declare that Cowell refused to be disciplined, had an opinion on everything, and never did what he was told. According to his mother, Cowell was “a horrendous child, worse than all my other sons” (perhaps because he despised her cooking and said so on numerous occasions!).

In I Hate to Be Rude, but…: Simon Cowell’s Book of Nasty Comments, by Tony Cowell and Michael Winner, the authors claim that when Simon Cowell was a child, “Everything had to revolve around him. He set the loft on fire, cut off his younger brother’s hair, built his own pub in the garden shed, and steadfastly refused to go to school.”

No big deal, you say? Well, depending on the rules in your family of origin, Cowell’s behavior may or may not seem all that terrible! But are his childhood remarks “nasty,” as the authors claim?

What follows is proof, according to the authors, that Cowell began his “meanness” when he was just a kid. As you review their evidence, keep in mind they have a book title to prove!

Age 4: When asked whether he liked his mum’s new fur hat, Cowell replied, “Mum, you look like a poodle.”

Age 5: To his music teacher during a lesson: “Miss, this noise is dreadful. Why are you making us do it?”

Age 5: On meeting Liz Taylor, who lived next door: “Who’s the girl with the big tits and all the diamonds?”

Age 6: To actor Trevor Howard, at a family party: “I don’t like actors.”

Age 7: To his younger brother Nicholas: “Father Christmas isn’t real, and the sooner you come to terms with it, the better.”

Age 12: In his first letter home to his parents from boarding school: Dear Mum and Dad, I hope you are finally glad to get rid of me and you are happy in your centrally heated house, because I’m in a freezing cold dormitory with nothing to eat.”

Age 13: In a letter to his parents from school: I have a sneaking suspicion that Newton’s theory isn’t going to play a huge part in my future.”

Could it be that Simon Cowell’s remarks are simply straightforward and completely legitimate, supporting his reported (and observed) attitude that…“If you think it, say it?”

Of interest is that Simon Cowell’s father, Eric Cowell, was an estate agent developer and music industry executive. At one point, Cowell senior secured a job for his son in the mail room… after his son had dropped out of school and also performed poorly in the workplace (due to his apparent inability to get along with bosses and co-workers!).

Cowell and his father no doubt endured numerous power struggles during those years. It is likely that the young Cowell also witnessed his father’s fawning manner with employees, customers, and temperamental clients in his efforts to earn a good living. Perhaps his son vowed that when he was a grown-up, he would never flatter anyone! We can only imagine the sucking-up that was expected in his father's industry at that time (and maybe always!).

Whatever the case may be, when a young person is quickly able to see (and name) what adults would rather ignore or minimize (“Father Christmas isn’t real, and the sooner you come to terms with it, the better.”), a power struggle inevitably ensues. Adults learn to bow to social propriety, but a young person like Simon Cowell speaks out with abandon (“If I think it, I say it!”), regardless the cost.

And by speaking out for so many years and promoting his so-called right opinions, and thereby convincing others he was right (albeit aggravating), Cowell continued to gain greater and greater confidence in his skills of observation, including his ability to quickly know what is or isn’t quality… or real… or believable…or whatever!

Thus, for Cowell and for those with show business acumen, qualifying a performance as excellent, or even good, when it isn’t, is aggravating. False praise also sends several underlying messages, including: (1) mediocrity is the best we can hope for; (2) you can’t do better; and (3) we don’t think you can handle the truth. None of these messages is encouraging, but to Cowell, not the point at all! He has said, “I hate political correctness,” and no doubt his behavior is a testimony to that pronouncement.

And apparently, Idol performers count on him not to be politically correct, but to do what he does best: identify what is and isn't "best." If you doubt it, observe the actual singers as they receive the three judges’ evaluations following their performances.

Contestants appear to listen, with glazed eyes, to the first two judges' opinions, smiling politely, as if to say, “Okay, are we through here?” Following that, each one looks toward Simon Cowell for the real story.

At that point, observant viewers are able to witness the visible shift in each contestant's body language. Eyes widen and shoulders become tense as one performer at a time anxiously and intently listens for Cowell’s statement of worth. Everyone, including the naysayers, knows his opinion is the one. In fact, the evidence of Cowell’s accuracy is paradoxically proven by the behavior of the live audience. Audience members - so sure that he is right - often prohibit Cowell from commenting by booing and yelling when he tries to speak.

In the end, Cowell’s ability to recognize and to articulate what is right or wrong with a particular performance inspires hope in the contestants and makes the selection process authentic. His so-called nastiness hits a chord with viewers, capturing the collective truth we all see, yet ironically are powerless in our own lives (all too often) to say to those around us.

And for the record, chances are his mother did look like a poodle in the new hat; the music was awful (and maybe the teacher not so talented); Liz Taylor did emphasize her buxom figure and wear a load of diamonds; Trevor Howard did look unfriendly (as his scowling picture demonstrates on the previous post – perhaps suggesting to the young Cowell that all actors are unlikable); learning about the fantasy of Father Christmas is upsetting to children; college will never be as cushy as home life; and we’ve all cried fowl about having to jump through a few ridiculous hoops for the privilege of calling ourselves educated!

One quickly gets the idea that even as a child, Simon Cowell was clear he alone knew what was best!

Out of the Mouths of Babes

2008-05-25T11:17:00.021-05:00

Just for fun, let’s take a look at the conversation of a rather well-known entertainer (not Trevor Howard pictured here) to identify his/her worldview. Although not a concise memory about a specific occurrence, we can indeed identify this person’s worldview by looking at what he/she said as a kid.

And by the way, if you have access to your baby book, take a look at your own outspoken childhood remarks. You know, those innocent utterances that seemed so cute or so clever (or so embarrassing and unexpected!) to your parents when you were a kid. What might your remarks tell us about your worldview?

Review the following bits of conversation to select the owner and his/her worldview.

Age 4: When asked whether she/he liked his/her mother’s new fur hat, this person replied, “Mom, you look like a poodle.”

Age 5: To his/her music teacher during a lesson: “Miss, this noise is dreadful. Why are you making us do it?”

Age 5: On meeting Liz Taylor, who lived next door: “Who’s the girl with the big tits and all the diamonds?”

Age 6: To actor Trevor Howard (pictured above), at a family party: “I don’t like actors.”

Age 7: To a younger sibling: “Christmas isn’t real, and the sooner you come to terms with it, the better.”

Vote in the poll to the right by selected one of the entertainers listed here. (Note: These polls are now closed, and the responses are listed below.)
1. Simon Cowell (50%)
2. Roseanne Bar (0%)
3. Don Rickles (37%)
4. Joan Rivers (0%)

Also select this person’s worldview from the following four choices:
1. I have to "push buttons."(30%)
2. I have to be honest. (50%)
3. I know what's best. (10%)
4. I have to entertain. (10%)

POWER PLAY

2008-05-17T22:25:00.034-05:00

Let’s begin by posing a question: Of the four professions in the poll, which one is least likely occupied by a woman? As you ponder the answer, reflect on the following passage from our successful woman’s first memory.

“When you pass by the nurse’s station, grin real big,” and he demonstrated by grinning real big for me. He said, “You can show them that you’re not going to be stopped.” He was so tall and I was so short, and they weren’t going to stop us.

Women’s Work, Men’s Work: Sex Segregation on the Job (published way back in the late 80’s!) is a frequently cited book in which the authors argue that society, the economy, and individuals all lose when workers are allocated to jobs on the basis of gender, race, or age, rather than on their ability to perform the work. Occupational segregation restricts individuals’ chances for self-fulfillment. Thus, when jobs are classified as men’s work or women’s work, neither men nor women are able to do the jobs that might suit them best.

Once you read the summary of the successful woman’s earliest memories, perhaps you will agree that she is, in fact, working in an occupation that suits her …even though she has chosen an occupation atypical for women.

For anyone who knows much about a chemical plant, he or she is aware that getting past the guard gate requires nearly an act of congress! Because of the potential for personal injury, sabotage, or even the probability of getting lost, gaining access to a chemical plant is a true rigamarow, and especially since 911. Even after passing a background check and a brief safety test, each outsider has to sign in, make known the nature of his or her business, wear a badge and protective gear, and leave in a timely manner. One thing is certain: No unauthorized person just drops by a chemical plant and walks right in.

And no woman just drops by a chemical plant, hoping to be hired as a chemical plant operator either. For years, the position of plant operator was considered a man’s job. Even today, some men can be heard grumbling about women taking “men’s jobs” at the plants. The suggestion, among others, used to be that because these jobs pay well, shouldn’t men be hired before women? Some also said, “If women are operators, who will turn the large valves and make the tough decisions in a crisis?” In the case of our successful woman, she had to show “them” she wasn’t going to be stopped.

Starting as a laborer in 1976 and working up to a truck loader the next year, our successful woman ultimately worked one year each in the various operator positions, until, in 1985, she became the A operator, or as it is called – the top operator. To say that this totally feminine, hearts and flowers female was ahead of her time is a completely authentic statement. In fact, let’s remember the world in 1976, when she hired on as a laborer.

Jimmy Carter was elected President of the United States. The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that the death penalty is not inherently cruel or unusual and is a constitutionally acceptable form of punishment. One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest won Best Picture. Love Will Keep Us Together won Best Record, and Still Crazy After All These Years won Best Album. Our nation celebrated the Bicentennial, a first-class stamp cost $0.13, and gas was about $0.67 a gallon! Yes, the social climate was definitely naïve in 1976.

In fact, only 56 years prior, President Woodrow Wilson urged Congress to pass what became the Nineteenth Amendment, providing that neither any individual state, nor the federal government, may deny a citizen the right to vote because of that person’s sex. Think about it this way: If you are a seasoned baby boomer reading this post, it is entirely possible that your grandmother was prohibited from voting for president – at least when she was first of voting age!

Thus, we might say, women have come a long way, and although there still are fewer women than men working in top positions in the control room of a chemical plant, some women are in those top positions, including our successful woman….now in her 32nd year as a chemical plant employee, 23 of those years as a top operator.

In reflecting on the entire first memory, are you also able to see that she is comfortable with power and with taking direction from a powerful person…in this case the doctor, a tall man, who showed her how to pass the nurse’s station with ease? She goes with him, takes his hand, pays attention to his direction, and is thereby rewarded with being able to see her mother.

In fact, as a consequence of paying careful attention to the tall doctor, she would have learned also how to return again to her mother’s bedside, when the doctor was not with her. By paying attention, she would later be able to mimic his actions and walk right past the nurses’ station into her mother’s room, just as though she had clearance – just as though “a company official had authorized her access to the mother’s room.”

She thus recalls the doctor teaching her about attitude and how to carry herself (with a smile like you’re not going to be stopped). Respect the power, but know how to flourish in the midst of it….a lesson she learned well and kept with her all these years...a lesson that has enabled her to thrive in an occupational world inhabited by men. Yes, it is so clear that her worldview is “I’m powerful via others.” Perhaps we might argue that when women appreciate men and become powerful with them, rather than against them, everyone is more likely to succeed, just as she has succeeded.

In the second memory, we are again witness to her empowerment via others. She listens to the adults’ instructions and keeps in her mind the signs to pay attention to, thus assuring that the birthday girl will not be ignored should she become overheated or overexcited, as evidenced by turning blue.

This, in fact, is the job of a plant operator: He or she must monitor the activity of the chemical process in action, and by looking often to a computer screen for signs and symptoms of anything getting out of balance or becoming overheated or over-stimulated; the operator can quickly orchestrate adjustments.

Failing to notice the young girl turning blue could have resulted in a family tragedy, just as failing to notice a chemical plant process getting out of balance could lead to a community tragedy. Thus we see that in the memory with the birthday girl, there is something higher going on than having a good time; just as in the memory of the mother in the hospital, there is something higher going on than making a visit.

Interestingly, both memories also involve illness and the owner’s relationship to illness. In both, our successful woman is neither a nurse nor a caretaker, so much as she is empowered by others to visit, to play with, and to align with the adults in managing someone else’s potential problem. This also sounds similar to her occupation, wherein she uses her skills of attentiveness to avert potential problems so that others are productive, and more importantly, so that others remain safe in the process of being productive.

As you might imagine, there is so much more in these two short memories than time allows for discussion, but it is true that our successful woman wasn’t going to be stopped (because she is powerful via others)! And good for her! When she soon retires from the chemical plant, I daresay she will again show everyone that she’s not going to be stopped in moving forward. What might she tackle next? (Indeed, her earliest memories give us some clues....do you see them?)

Grin to Win: Earliest Memories of a Successful Woman

2008-05-09T21:33:00.020-05:00

Let's turn now to a successful Louisiana native. After reading her two earliest memories, you can select both her profession and her worldview by casting two separate votes in the polls to the right.

(1.) I remember one time when I was five and the doctor took me into see Mama in the hospital. He took my hand and said, “When you pass by the nurse’s station, grin real big,” and he demonstrated by grinning real big for me. He said, “You can show them that you’re not going to be stopped.” He was so tall and I was so short, and they weren’t going to stop us.

(2.) When I was 7, I remember my parents’ friends had a daughter who was about a year younger than I was, and we would play together. She had Down’s syndrome. We were all together for her birthday celebration, and I remember sitting around the table watching her blow out the candles on her birthday cake. After we had cake, we all went outside and played like regular children. At that time, we didn’t know any different and she was just like one of us. The only thing we had to watch for was if she got over-stimulated and started turning blue. She had heart problems.

What do you think? Is this person a college professor, a chemical plant operator, a mental health counselor, or an automobile salesperson?

Please vote in the poll to the right. (Note: This poll is now closed - and the results are... college professor (28%); chemical plant operator (42%); mental health professional (28%); automobile salesperson (0%). The correct answer is chemical plant operator.

And what is her worldview? (Note: This poll is now closed - and the results are included below - listed as percentage of those voting for that choice.) The correct answer is "I'm powerful via others."

1. I get my way. (6%)

2. I fake it to make it. (18%)

3. A smile opens doors. (12%)

4. I'm powerful via others. (62%)

Thank you for participating! I welcome your comments.

Do you remember your future?

2008-05-02T21:15:00.028-05:00

All of us have memories.
All of us ruminate.
To find a useful application of memories is empowering.
And here’s why.

Thinkwriting is about accessing completely specific, singularly occurring, early childhood moments that take place before a person reaches puberty. In these specific childhood moments are found the authentic fingerprints of one’s future.

Although it might be enjoyable to look back and remember how much fun it was to visit Uncle Paul and Aunt Effie on the farm, or to recollect how everyone at your house stopped whatever he or she was doing on Sunday night to watch Bonanza, or even how you hated riding the school bus the year you lived in Boston, these kinds of general recollections are not specific occurrences and therefore tell us only about your childhood and not about how you remember your future.

Just keep in mind that all early memories are not created equal. If you review Thinkwriter, you will notice that every person’s memory discussed on the blog, including the memories of the two Clintons (Bill and Hillary), as well as those of Obama, McCain, Dowd, O'Donnell, McGreevey and others, is a recollection of a specific occurrence or several specific occurrences. The good news is that knowing your own or someone else’s earliest memories is the revealing of the worldview.

Plain and simple.
Just like we like it.
Thinkwriting: Writing to Remember Your Future.

Pretending...

2008-04-27T09:58:00.017-05:00

To be sure, the most striking feature of our mystery person's earliest memories is the fact that she witnessed something mysterious and remarkably painful every day of her life from age six until she became a young adult. And try as her family might, no one, not her parents, their friends, the doctors, her extended family, or friends of friends … no one was able to solve the puzzle of her brother’s painful leg for many years. Even after moving to another country and consulting with a whole new set of physicians, the riddle of the leg persisted.

In fact, when the mystery was finally solved, it brought new pain and different challenges for her brother and also for the whole family. Even she gave up her college degree to be available to him after the surgery. Everyone’s focus, including hers, was on her male sibling.

We can appreciate, therefore, that to manage the upset of watching her brother live in pain every day, she would have to do what she could not to notice, and to go on with life somehow ignoring the agony of his situation… and the angst of her own (having always to set aside her needs in lieu of his).

If accomplished, such a feat would be similar to what family members of alcoholics do to carry on with their own lives when they feel managed by a family member’s drinking. As the saying goes, they learn to ignore the elephant in the room, even though it is always present, always controlling everyone and everything. In time, people learn not to see their own realities.

As a result, the concept of pretending is especially significant for our mystery writer. Keep in mind that she is looking back at these particularly significant moments, because they hold special meaning for her in present time. In each there is an element of pretending…coupled with a reality that something else is going on. What is that "something else," do you suppose?

Recall her first group of one-line memories. The first involves a battery-operated toy. When a child plays with an ordinary toy, he or she creates imaginary connections and exchanges with the toy, staying engaged for some time. Oddly enough, when a toy is also battery-operated, it can seem to have a mind of its own, in that it is programmed to produce the same sounds or movements over and over, in effect “controlling” the interaction between the child and the toy. Our mystery writer remembers "chickens pecking at rice." Perhaps you recall a battery-operated toy from your childhood.

I remember a talking doll. Inside her back could be found a small opening for a large battery. I knew my doll always “spoke” the same words and in the same order, but I pretended not to notice. We chatted with one another, although it was my doll who directed our conversation (at least when the batteries were working!).

And what about a so-called dead snake at the end of a stick? Snakes may appear to be dead, but they are just being still – as is their nature. Slithering snakes startle us. They grab our attention and typically increase our anxiety, if only by their reputation.

And finally, what about a teacher who punishes the wrong child? Perhaps the wrongly accused is only pretending to be innocent. Then again, perhaps the teacher favors one child over the other. Regardless the explanation, we know the students are at the mercy of the teacher. It is she who rules the day.

And moving on to the memory of a glorious day at the beach, we find a degree of pretending in this memory, as well. The beach may be delightful, but it can also be difficult – with too much sun, too much heat, and sand that is too hot on bare feet, among other discomforts.

Going to the beach can also be a good escape, as suggested by the mention of Bruce Springsteen’s refrain… “Down the shore everything’s all right.” It’s easier to endure “sand so hot you had to dance your way to the refreshingly cold water and waves” than to watch a brother in pain. But try as one might to walk casually toward the shore in bare feet, it is the burning hot sand that controls the speed of the steps.

Thus we see that these are not memories from someone “taking care of others” or simply being “moved by life.” To select either of these worldviews, we would have to ignore all the references and metaphors related to “pretending” and to “something else going on.” And what is “going on,” we are wondering. Well, the “something else going on” is a reference to control. Even her childhood toy reminds her that she is not in charge. And keep in mind; she collected all these images because they represent her life now…and tell us her worldview.

Batteries controlled the chickens’ movements. A slithering snake controlled her actions with the stick; her teacher controlled who received blame; the hot sand controlled her steps toward the water; and most important of all, a mystery illness controlled her family’s every choice, even including who received attention, what country they lived in, and the degree to which she could enjoy or even have her own life.

Not surprisingly, the owner of these memories never realized that she, herself, had become battery-operated, if you will, programmed to be controlled by someone for whom pretending was a way of life.

In the end, the worldview of our mystery owner, Dina Matos McGreevey, former First Lady of New Jersey, is “I miss the obvious.” As we know, it was her husband, New Jersey governor Jim McGreevey who resigned his office in August 2004, with the revelation that he was a gay American.

Even today, people wonder how McGreevey’s wife could miss that he was gay. But in reviewing Dina McGreevey’s earliest memories, we can appreciate that she was trained by life to miss the obvious. She was well-prepared not to see.

In her own words… “The Jim McGreevey I fell in love with was passionate, direct, and plain-spoken, a charismatic man whose warmth and easy manner rapidly took him from the mayor’s office to the New Jersey governor’s mansion. The Jim McGreevey I married turned out to be passive, evasive, and secretive, a hesitant man whose duplicity and unchecked ambition proved to be his downfall and derailed our lives. And I never saw it coming.”

“And now,” as Paul Harvey would say, “[we] know the rest of the story!”

Three memories from a mystery person...

2008-04-17T20:39:00.036-05:00

(1.) I recall a battery-operated toy - chickens pecking at rice that I received for my fourth birthday; a dead snake that appeared to come back to life as it slithered off the end of the stick I was carrying; and the time the teacher slapped my hand with a ruler because she said another girl had copied off my paper during a test.

(2.) Among my most vivid memories and pleasurable memories, though, is one of a day at the beach, the sand so hot you had to dance your way to the refreshingly cold water and waves. It was on the shore, where we rented a house for the summer with my grandmother, and it was the start of my lifelong love of the ocean, because as Bruce Springsteen sings in “Jersey Girl,” “…down the shore everything’s all right.”

(3.) My most indelible memory, however, is not of long, pleasant days at the beach, but of a day that would change my family’s life forever. I was about six, and my mother was riding home on her bicycle from visiting someone in town, with my brother, then two, in a seat on the back. Somehow he got his foot caught in the spokes, causing the bike to fall over. In the moment, the spill seemed unremarkable. My mother got herself and my brother back on the bike and headed home. But that would be the last untroubled day my family would have for many years.

That night my brother was in pain, crying and unable to sleep. Within a few days, his left thigh had become grotesquely swollen and his veins blue and bulging. His leg looked like the leg of an old man. There was no improvement in the days that followed. Our family doctor didn’t know what was wrong, though he saw my brother and examined his leg several times over the next couple of weeks. It wasn’t a break. It wasn’t a sprain. Maybe a torn ligament? No one really knew. But my brother was in constant pain, and he limped as he walked. My mother was distraught because she felt so responsible. She believed that it was cancer and that he would die.

(Note: This person’s parents then began a journey to find out what was wrong, using all their resources to do so. Eventually, when this person was 8 ½ years old, the family left their home and moved to the United States in search of a cure for their son. It took another ten years or so before the family finally learned what was wrong with him. He had an inoperable lymphatic tumor in his leg. Perhaps the bike accident assaulted the tumor, bringing it out of its dormant stage – no one can say for sure. At age 18, the brother’s leg was amputated to the top of his thigh. The owner of the memories was in the last year of college, but took a leave of absence to be available to the brother and the family.)

Please select from the choices below what you believe to be this person's worldview. Cast your vote in the poll to the right. Thank you!

1. I take care of others. (6%)

2. I miss the obvious. (31%)

3. Chicken soup is for the soul. (0%)

4. Life moves me. (61%)

(By the way, when the owner of these memories is revealed... and unless you have been living on another planet, you will know of him or her.)

This poll is now closed and the correct answer is in blue. Thank you for voting!

Memorable Punishments: A Closer Look at McCain's Early Memories

2008-04-06T11:44:00.044-05:00

John Sydney McCain, III, the presumptive Republican nominee for President of the United States in the upcoming 2008 presidential election, was actually born in the Panama Canal Zone, where his naval officer father was stationed in 1936.

Reared as the middle child of three, McCain spent his childhood on various naval postings in the United States and in the Pacific, altogether attending about 20 schools. Said to be a competitive kid with a drive to prevail, McCain demonstrated a quick temper and a reputation for run-ins with higher-ups, possibly leading to his low class rank (894/899). Nevertheless, McCain graduated from the naval academy and interestingly became a naval pilot of attack aircraft. No doubt his family was proud, given that his grandfather and his father (John Sydney McCain and John Sydney McCain, Jr.) were the first pair of father/son Four Star Admirals in the United States Navy. In fact, both of McCain's early memories reference a naval officer.

John McCain’s two early memories contain other similarities as well. Both involve anger; both reference an explosion; both include a naval officer who is sharing information; both include a surprise attack, as well as an act of war, water, the loss of control, abandonment, a reference to black, and teaching someone a lesson.

Thus, we learn a great deal about John McCain from his two memories, most significantly that his worldview is anger empowers. To be sure, even as young as two-years-old, McCain is experiencing “anger power” within himself. Imagine how intensely angry one has to feel in order to hold one’s breath until passing out. Perhaps we now have a glimpse into the steely reserve of a man capable of enduring torture at the hands of the North Vietnamese.

And this is to say nothing of his parents’ response to their son’s brand of temper tantruming. At the suggestion of a naval officer (in the military, doctors are officers), his parents attempt to take control of their son’s anger by blind-siding him with ice cold water; in effect, not unlike the Japanese blind-sided the Americans at Pearl Harbor. In each incident, a surprise attack involving being "bombed" into the water is intended to show who has the upper hand ... now!?

In his parents’ defense, however, we must consider the nature of parenting in 1938. Children were to be seen and not heard and certainly, children were not considered social equals: Equals in the sense of deserving equal dignity and respect. The fear was that if children were allowed to do as they pleased, the result would be a houseful of tyrants, resulting in anarchy!

In a military home in which parents live by the rule of hierarchy, we can only imagine McCain’s parents’ complete and unrelenting intolerance for a temper tantrum. Even today, most parents do not understand that children are never aware of the motive behind their behavior. Children don’t reason out their social problems consciously. Rather, they act from an inner motivation and learn by trial and error. Children are expert observers, but they make many mistakes in interpreting what they observe. They often draw wrong conclusions and choose mistaken ways in which to find their place in society… as did two-year-old McCain when he passed out one time after holding his breath while angry. The response he received from his concerned parents strongly reinforced his mistaken strategy for regaining a sense of power… and the rest is history, as reported by his early memory.

By the way, it is worth noting that during childhood, a child must make adjustments to and learn how to handle both his inner and his outer environment. McCain’s hereditary endowment is his “inner” environment (i.e., a quick temper), and his “outer” environment includes his family atmosphere, his birth order, and as already mentioned, the nature of parenting at the time of his upbringing.

Keep in mind, therefore, that McCain was reared as a middle child – an often rather difficult position. In a family of three children, the second child, who once had the distinction of being the baby, has been dethroned and is now the middle child. He suddenly discovers that he doesn’t have the advantage of being older, nor does he any longer have the privilege of being the baby – resulting in a feeling of being slighted and abused. He has the impression that life and people are unfair, and he may be provocative in order to feel even more justified in his assumptions. It is well-documented that McCain has gone to great lengths to create himself as a unique person – seeming to take pride in going against the majority when possible and frequently doing the unexpected.

For example, after being taken prisoner of war in October 1967, McCain had the opportunity to be released in 1968. McCain’s father was named commander of all U.S. forces in the Vietnam theater in July 1968. Immediately, McCain was offered early release; however, he turned down the offer of repatriation, saying he would only accept if every man taken before him was released as well. Romantically speaking, at least, a captain doesn’t leave the ship until all his men are safe ashore. In reality, of course, the captain is often the first to shore. Nevertheless, McCain’s spent five and a half years as a prisoner of war, later becoming a celebrity of sorts as the most well-knowned returning POW to date.

Needless to say, because so much of McCain’s personal identity is connected to his war experiences, as well as to those of his father and grandfather, it is not surprising that McCain would romanticize war and be tolerant, for example, of staying the course in Iraq for a really long time.

We note that in one of his earliest memories, a naval officer informs the family that the Japanese have bombed Pearl Harbor, after which McCain’s father is rarely seen by his family for four years. Thus from the time McCain is in kindergarten (age 5) until the fourth grade (age 9), war is foremost in his family’s mind – and in the minds of all the people with whom their family associates. In time, therefore, war becomes tolerable, even comfortable - the expected.

And today, as the saying goes, you can take the man out of the war, but you can’t take war out of the man. In McCain’s earliest memories, we find both the presence of war within him and throughout his history. With a worldview that says anger empowers, voters will take note of a clear preference for war, as well as a preference for showing force and for extolling the virtues of a military presence, making McCain an ideal choice for the Republican party’s nominee for the U. S. Presidency. (Note: To read the two earliest memories on which this review is based, see the post below, dated Friday, March 28, 2008.)

Bombs Away: Two Memories by McCain

2008-03-28T15:32:00.027-05:00

The day the Japanese sank the fleet in Pearl Harbor is one of my earliest memories. I was five years old. We were living in New London at the time. It was a Sunday morning, and my entire family was – for reasons I cannot recall – standing in the front yard of our small house. A black car passing our house slowed down and the driver, a naval officer, rolled down his window and shouted, “Jack, the Japs have bombed Pearl Harbor.” My father left for the base immediately. I saw very little of him for the next four years.

~John McCain

~~~

As a two year old, I went off in a mad frenzy at the smallest of provocations, and then, suddenly, I would crash to the floor unconscious. My parents consulted a Navy physician for an explanation. The doctor said it was self-induced… when I got angry I held my breath until I blacked out. He instructed my parents to fill a bathtub with cold water whenever I commenced a tantrum, and when I appeared to be holding my breath to drop me, fully clothed, into it.

When I worked myself into a tiny rage, my mother shouted to my father, “Get the water!” Moments later I found myself thrashing, wide-eyed and gasping for breath, in a tub of icy-cold water. Eventually I received a satisfactory (if only temporary) control over my emotions.

~John McCain

~~~

Please vote for your choice of a worldview in the poll to the right*. Select from the following choices:

1. War disrupts.(23%)

2. Anger empowers.(46%)

3. Life is surprising.(23%)

4. Cold water runs deep.(1%)

(NOTE: This poll is now closed - results are in blue.)

RENEGADE: Obama's Early Memory

2008-03-20T07:24:00.036-05:00

Although labeled Renegade by the Secret Service, a term used to describe a fallen Christian or a knight without allegiance, Barack Obama emerges as the consummate gentleman, standing tall and proud as today’s political rising star. And if any would question the motive for Obama’s assigned codename, he or she would want to proceed with caution; Barack Obama, after all, is not only the most mysterious political candidate in many a year, he is also the most protected. So keep in mind that renegade can just as easily be interpreted to mean "breaking with established customs," exactly what Obama hopes to do.

Even so, Barack Obama’s history and persona are intriguing and an aspect of what makes him so attractive. We just love the idea of a savior. Historically, we are drawn to the mysterious in hopes that something we haven’t been able to figure out will be solved by a rare and gifted person. Yes…whatever the challenge, we look for the magic bullet. It is thus our tendency to bestow the most positive explanations on the behavior of those we know the least about…and this proclivity is nothing new.

Take, for example, the 17th century concept of the noble savage, a term used at the time to idealize humans unencumbered by civilization. Long since discarded, this concept suggests that those uncorrupted by commerce are essentially good; in fact, morally superior. Attributes of the “noble savage” include not only living in harmony with nature, but also generosity and selflessness, innocence, inability to lie, fidelity, physical health, disdain of luxury, moral courage, and a “natural” intelligence or innate, untutored wisdom. Twentieth Century examples include Tonto from the Lone Ranger television program and Tarzan, two modern day enigmas who just seem to know.

A more recent illustration involves children once thought to be superhuman. These so-called superhumans first came to light because of their apparent ability to triumph in the face of adversity. Even now, they somehow sail through incredibly harsh circumstances, unscathed and thriving beyond what anyone might have expected. Labeled resilient, these children were eventually studied in order to unravel the mystery and perhaps replicate their strengths in society. Over time, researchers learned that children are not born superhuman. Rather, resilience is born out of adversity when certain factors are in play, such as having had at least one person in their young lives who genuinely valued and supported them unconditionally.

In Leech Marks, we find Barack asking questions of his stepfather, Lolo, an Indonesian gentleman Barack’s mother first met at the University of Hawaii. Lolo has an idea of what the slender built Barack Obama must develop in order to become a man: strength. But to Barack, who watches Lolo “out of the corner of my eye,” Lolo is more than fascinating; he is a bit frightening.

When Lolo starts elaborating about the inevitability of pain, the young and somewhat discomforted Obama shifts the focus of the conversation back on Lolo.

“Have you ever seen a man killed?” Barack asks.

Lolo glances down, surprised by the question.

“Have you?” Barack asks again.

“Yes,” Lolo says.

“Was it bloody?”

“Yes.”

And before Lolo has the opportunity to regain his momentum in the conversation, Barack begins again.

“Why was the man killed? The one you saw?”

“Because he was weak.”

“That’s all?”

Lolo counters with the explanation that being weak is basically enough to get a man killed. Obama listens, but later fails to answer Lolo’s question pertaining to which he, Barack Obama, would rather be: weak or strong. Obama knows, of course, what Lolo expects him to say, but answering “strong” might bring immediate and perhaps unpleasant consequences. Would Lolo expect something of Barack right now?

Turns out not answering is the best answer of all. It would seem that even as a young man, Barack Obama knows that the person who talks the least has the most power.

Indeed, Obama’s silence brings forth a compromise from Lolo: If you can’t be strong, be clever and make peace with someone who is strong. Lolo might as well be saying, if you can’t be the king, be the court jester.

In societies where the freedom of speech was not recognized as a right, the court jester (precisely because anything he said was by definition “a jest”) could speak frankly in a way for which anyone else would have been severely punished. So, if you can’t be strong, be clever. Ignore the hurt by being strong or avoid the hurt by being clever.

The significant aspect of this exchange with his stepfather is that even when offered a compromise, Barack never commits to anything. He remains shrewdly ambivalent. Obama simply plays the middle; thus, his stepfather can interpret the outcome however he wishes, most likely to Obama’s favor.

Barack thus demonstrates it is clever to let others lead him, much like he does now. If he says he is will be strong, there may be immediate consequences. If he chooses clever, then cleverness is on stage and thus no longer clever. Better to stay quiet and play the middle. In essence, better to literally and figuratively remain the black white man and the white black man…neither black nor white, but in the middle where many are able to interpret the outcome however they wish, or more to the point: where many are able to project onto Obama what they wish him to stand for and what they believe they hear him saying.

Yes, without a doubt, Obama’s worldview is “Don’t commit,” a perspective on life that will have astute voters paying even closer attention to what Obama does not say, as compared to what he seems to be saying. (Note: Read the memory on which this review is based in a post dated March 14, 2008.)

Leech Marks: Barack Obama Remembers

2008-03-14T21:49:00.025-05:00

I remember once when Lolo, my stepfather, rolled up one of his pant legs to scratch his calf. I noticed a series of indented scars that ran from his ankle halfway up his shin.

“What are those?”

“Leech marks,” he said. “From when I was in New Guinea. They crawl inside your army boots while you’re hiking through the swamps. At night, when you take off your socks, they’re stuck there, fat with blood. You sprinkle salt on them and they die, but you still have to dig them out with a hot knife.”

I ran my finger over one of the oval groves. It was smooth and hairless where the skin had been singed. I asked Lolo if it had hurt.

“Of course it hurt,” he said, taking a sip from the jug. “Sometimes you can’t worry about hurt. Sometimes you worry only about getting where you have to go.”

We fell silent, and I watched him out of the corner of my eye. I realized that I had never heard him talk about what he was feeling. I had never seen him really angry or sad. He seemed to inhabit a world of hard surfaces and well-defined thoughts. A queer notion suddenly sprang into my head.

“Have you ever seen a man killed?” I asked him.

He glanced down, surprised by the question.

I asked again, “Have you?”

“Yes,” he said.

“Was it bloody?”

“Yes.”

I thought for a moment. “Why was the man killed? The one you saw?”

“Because he was weak.”

“That’s all?”

Lolo shrugged and rolled his pant leg back down. “That’s usually enough. Men take advantage of weakness in other men. They’re just like countries in that way. The strong man takes the weak man’s land. He makes the weak man work in his fields. If the weak man’s woman is pretty, the strong man will take her.” He paused to take another sip of water, then asked, “Which would you rather be?”

I didn’t answer, and Lolo squinted up at the sky. “Better to be strong,” he said finally, rising to his feet. “If you can’t be strong, be clever and make peace with someone who’s strong. But always better to be strong yourself. Always.”

~Barack Obama

Please vote for your choice of Barack Obama's WORLDVIEW in the poll to the right. Thank you for participating!
1. Stay out of the swamp
2. Clever trumps strength
3. Men need to be strong
4. Don't commit

NOTE: Voting results for this poll (now closed and removed) are the following: Stay out of the swamp - 2 votes (10%); Clever trumps strength - 3 votes (15%); Men need to be strong - 10 votes (52%); Don't commit - 4 votes (21%). See the post entitled "Renegade: Obama's Early Memory" to learn the correct answer.

Coming soon....

2008-03-14T07:22:00.007-05:00

An early memory
from Barack Obama.

Things just aren't what they seem....

2008-03-10T21:52:00.014-05:00

Okay…so we know a person’s worldview is sustained throughout life, and although it may be differently articulated in subtle ways from time to time, a person’s worldview remains the same.

Seems simple enough, yes? The problem with worldview, however, is that we cannot readily name our own worldview, because we can’t get out of our own way long enough to see how we see things! Our worldview can’t stand up to the scrutiny of our own common sense, and even though we have the capacity to grasp what it is (and benefit from the knowledge), we cannot do so on our own.

In terms of Hillary, her worldview will always be things aren’t what they seem (or some subtle variation of that concept), but she would never just say that to us in plain language. What she does instead is communicate her worldview to us through her memories. From the millions and millions of childhood moments she might have remembered, she innocently (as in...without awareness) chooses the ones that clearly say things are not what they seem.

In other words, because memory is never random, Hillary “tells” us her worldview in what she chooses to remember. For example, in the “second look” memory, she relates a situation in which she mistakes turpentine for coke. What appears to be “delicious and refreshing” is actually an organic solvent used for thinning oil-based paints. It can cause renal failure when ingested, among other problems.

And by the way, one of the rewarding aspects of knowing one’s early memories is how helpful they can be in present time. Hillary might now choose to bring the turpentine memory to mind, if only to remind herself to pay attention to what she is consuming, lest it be poison (…like the negative press, for example.)

If we look a little deeper, we also observe that Hillary’s parents weren’t enough to keep her safe. We might wonder if that is something about her parents or something about parenting in general? Is safety for children a make-believe concept?

Parents and non-parents may answer differently, with parents pointing out that no matter how vigilant a parent is, a child can still get hurt. Non-parents, on the other hand, can often be heard insisting that if they were parents, their children would always be safe, no matter what it took! Herein we find the difference between experience and hope.

Indeed, if we want to observe real change in people, we can watch the metamorphosis of parents over the lifespan of their parenting! Perhaps you too have noticed how parents become increasingly humble with each passing year of their children’s lives.

In Hillary’s memory, her parents, or her parents’ surrogates, are not paying close enough attention to her at the time of her exploration, and she is able to gain access to turpentine disguised as a bottle of coke. Surely nothing is more inviting to a thirsty child than an open bottle of coke. And recall that children won’t try to drink anything at all, unless they are thirsty. If you doubt it, try forcing liquids on a child who is not feeling thirst. This suggests that Hillary was also “thirsty” and perhaps “hungry,” (just as she is now).

Metaphorically, in fact, our hunger and thirst push us forward….and in moving forward, we have every opportunity to learn and to grow, even though we risk getting hurt. In Hillary’s case, she apparently pushed forward on many occasions, resulting in a litany of injuries along the way. Evidently, the potential for hurt (in every sense of the word) has never stopped her, nor is it now. (Note: To read the earliest memory on which this review is based, see the post below, dated March 7, 2008.)

Giving Hillary a Second Look

2008-03-07T20:14:00.014-06:00

To test the accuracy of Hillary Clinton's worldview, let's look at another of her early memories. Does her worldview hold true? What do you think? Please cast your vote for the worldview that best fits Hillary, based on her following memory...

As a toddler, I spotted a Coke bottle that painters in our apartment building had filled with turpentine. I began drinking it before anyone knew what I was doing. The adults around me reacted quickly to prevent serious consequences. The experience cured me of ingesting anything I wasn’t sure about. But as I grew up, even with watchful adults hovering close by, I still had more than my share of accidents: an arm scalded with boiling water, gashed ankles, knees, and eyebrows; and falling down the stairs.

~Hillary Clinton

Readers voted and here are the results:

Things aren't what the seem. - 72%

I am accident prone. - 0%

Life is dangerous. - 27%

Someone needs to be in charge - 0%

Over the rainbow, skies are...blue?

2008-02-29T21:10:00.033-06:00

Hillary Clinton certainly stirs up controversy, and despite her apparent inability to secure the confidence of the American public at large, she has a remarkable record of firsts – First Lady for the United States; First Lady for the State of Arkansas; first female partner in the Rose Law Firm; first First Lady to run for public office; first female candidate elected senator from New York; first First Lady to be subpoenaed before a federal grand jury, and first woman in United States history to win a presidential party primary. How interesting that her early memory also contains a first…her first recollection of being totally scared.

I grabbed hold of my grandmother’s hand for comfort, only to discover that it was as clammy as mine. It was the first time I remember being thoroughly scared.

Perhaps you remember your first viewing of The Wizard of Oz, a magical and invitingly scary movie that leaves an indelible impression on all who view it. In her own early memory, Hillary is stunned to discover that during the flying monkey scene in Oz, her grandmother is as frightened as she is! Ironically, according to novelist Salman Rushdie, the idea that adults are weak and inadequate is the movie’s driving energy. He first viewed the film at age ten and now credits it with making him a writer.

According to Rushdie, the film’s “driving force is the inadequacy of adults, even good adults, and how the weakness of grown-ups forces children to take control of their own destinies.” In terms of our purpose here, therefore, we can conclude that although the movie’s worldview might be “someone needs to be in charge,” this is clearly not Hillary’s worldview.

To the contrary, even as evidenced by her many firsts, Hillary is in charge – both intentionally and by experience – as a first born, a First Lady, a first female senator, and a first female winner of a presidential party primary. An unconscious motivation to be in charge is not what drives her. Hillary already places herself at the helm. In fact, it is likely her authoritative presence that discomforts all those who look for men to steer the biggest ships.

Perhaps it is her apparent fearlessness that bothers some. Paradoxically, because she has a history of leadership, Hillary Clinton has experienced fear many times, and as a consequence, courage has become her strong suit.

One of her heroines is said to be Eleanor Roosevelt, credited with the quote, “Do one thing everyday that scares you.” How intriguing that Hillary retains an entire memory to remind her that everyone is scared…and thus, things are never as they appear to be.

Even as young as eight years old, she experiences the reality that safety is an illusion. So, all you voters out there…don’t allude yourself, she might be saying now. The Wizard of Oz is not the only one who is smoke and mirrors; even a Wizard named Barack has a few problems of his own.

Without doubt, therefore, Hillary Clinton’s worldview is “things aren’t what they seem.” Movie houses are said to be all about entertainment, yet children get kidnapped there. Adults are said to keep us safe, yet Grandmother is scared to death. Boys are said to be braver than girls, yet Brother is hiding under the seat.

Turns out, the real world is scary as hell, and nearly all of life is staged. People buy into the illusion of safety because it’s safer! If the ship is sinking, most don’t really want to know. Try telling them, and this is what you’ll get: “Hey man: I’m on vacation!”

What we see in Hillary’s memory is that she’s not going to be tricked, because life is a trick. Just look at her now – fighting for what she probably believes is her birthright: the democratic nomination for the U.S. Presidency. Even though she surely knows her nomination is a long shot, she presses on. Some say she was a good person to look after a misbehaving prince, so she might also a good person to look after a wayward country. Problem is, the U.S. is still in its adolescence, and apparently, we just don’t want to be mothered....

or do we? Again...things just aren't what they seem.

(Note: To read the earliest memory on which this review is based, see the post below, dated Friday, February 22, 2008.)

Hillary Clinton remembers...

2008-02-22T21:49:00.016-06:00

I must have been about eight years old when my mother’s mother took me and my brother Hugh to see The Wizard of Oz. We went downtown to one of Chicago’s grand old movie palaces on a Sunday afternoon. I’d never been in so majestic a theater before.

On our way there, my grandmother kept warning us that little children sometimes got kidnapped by strangers from city movie houses. When we reached our seats, she sat between us and looped her arms around my brother and me to protect us from harm, real and imagined.

The scenarios she conjured up were enough to give us goose bumps even before the movie started. By the time those weird-looking winged monkeys flew out of the witch’s castle and Dorothy and Toto were grabbed and taken away, kids were screaming and my brother was trying to climb under his seat to hide. I grabbed hold of my grandmother’s hand for comfort, only to discover that it was as clammy as mine. It was the first time I remember being thoroughly scared. ~Hillary Clinton

Based on her early memory, what will you say is Hillary Clinton’s worldview? (NOTE: Poll is now closed, with results listed below.)

1. Things aren’t what they seem. (6 votes - 37%)
2. Monkeys fly. (0 votes - 0%)
3. Life is dangerous. (2 votes - 12%)
4. Someone needs to be in charge. (8 votes - 50%)

Please cast your ballot in the poll to the right. Thank you!

Down at the Station: A Backstage Look at Clinton's Early Memory

2008-02-15T20:34:00.040-06:00

Bill Clinton, former U.S. president, Arkansas governor, law professor, and Rhodes Scholar, left the oval office with the highest end-of-presidency approval rating of any president who came into office after World War II. His unprecedented popularity remained strong despite the Lewinsky scandal, which clearly raised questions about his personal character. Even so, the U.S. is said to have enjoyed more peace and economic well-being during his presidency than at any time in its history.

The question is: Was he the reason? Let’s explore Clinton’s early memory* and answer that question based on his worldview.

Clinton’s early memory portrays a powerful image of a distraught mother dropping to her knees in tears after putting her son on a train to go back home with his grandmother. Little Bill Clinton watches his mother’s emotional display from the passenger window where he and Grandmother presumably sit together waiting for the train to depart.

We can imagine the dramatic transfer of this adored child from one woman to the next woman, even as the object of their affection sits detached and observing… similar perhaps to a crown prince who has just been shepherded between two members of his royal court. Regardless the drama, a crown prince simply knows he is the primary concern.

Nevertheless, the emotional polarity is striking: one woman falling on her knees in tears in a public setting versus a young boy watching silently from a distance, and with no mention of moving closer to the window to press his nose against the glass, or turning to his grandmother to ask about his mother’s well-being. Might he have wondered, “Is Mother going to be okay?Will she ever stop crying?”

No, this is not the emphasis of Clinton’s memory. The detachment that is inferred is that young Clinton is not trying to go to her. Nothing about his recollection has him reaching back to her. He is okay as long as he is cared for by someone. In fact, in running for president, Hillary is caring for him now.

His lack of anxiety seems to demonstrate the expectation that both women are fully capable. When he was born, his mother was already a widow. He watched her go to work everyday and do things to make his life good. He didn’t know or expect anything different. And by his life, we are well-acquainted with his intelligence and his resourcefulness; thus, his practice of remaining detached and comfortable while others adore and care (or suffer) for him, especially women, is commonplace.

And speaking of women, what is the one thing the two women in the memory have in common?

The answer, of course, is Bill Clinton. Indeed, if we asked Bill Clinton the same question, he would have to say, “I am the answer,” and thus we have his worldview. The mother wouldn’t be on her knees crying, if not for him; and the grandmother wouldn’t be on the train to take him home, if not for him.

From the untold millions of moments he might have remembered from his childhood, Clinton calls to mind a moment wherein he is the answer. He is the reason his mother is crying and also the reason she is in school (to make a better life for him and her). He is also the reason his grandmother is in New Orleans and on the train with him now.

Consider also that Clinton remains composed and focused despite the chaos around him, because he is forever being taken care of by his intelligence. His intelligence doesn’t own him; he owns it, as demonstrated by his worldview.

And pushing the issue a bit further and in a slightly different direction: Consider his presence in a room full of politicians. He is often the answer in that setting, as well. From whom of several politicians might a nonpartisan audience most want to hear when complex national and global topics are being discussed and debated? George Bush? John McCain? Barack Obama? Rudy Giuliani? Bill Clinton? Which one? From whom might the audience expect to receive the most consistently intelligent and well-developed answers and counter-questions, regardless of party affiliation?

Based on his popularity and experience, many would respond, “Bill Clinton,” who no doubt would agree that, indeed, he is and has the answer(s). By his worldview, therefore, we know how he sees his role in the creation of world peace and economic well-being.

And finally, does his wife, Hillary Clinton, share his worldview? (Stay tuned.)

*Bill Clinton remembers:
After visiting my mother in New Orleans for a weekend, I remember seeing her drop to her knees, crying, by the side of the tracks when she put me on the train with my grandmother to go home. I was spending a year with my grandparents, while my mother attended a program in New Orleans that would grant her a nurse-anesthetist’s degree.

Our 42nd President...

2008-02-08T21:04:00.008-06:00

It is quite surreal to now be posting the following early memory on Thinkwriter, as just a few hours ago I shook hands with our former president, Mr. Bill Clinton. Even more interesting to me is that during his speech (given on behalf of his wife), our 42nd president referenced living with his grandmother as a very young boy while his mother attended school in New Orleans to become a nurse anesthetist. As I listened to Bill Clinton's remarks, I thought about his worldview and the memory I had long since planned to post on this blog and discuss next. The following is that memory. If only I could have had more time to speak with him about it tonight...what a treasure that would have been.

Bill Clinton remembers...

After visiting my mother in New Orleans for a weekend, I remember seeing her drop to her knees, crying, by the side of the tracks when she put me on the train with my grandmother to go home. I was spending a year with my grandparents, while my mother attended a program in New Orleans that would grant her a nurse-anesthetist’s degree.

Choose Clinton’s worldview from the following four and mark your "ballot" in the poll to the right. (NOTE: Poll has been taken down - with results listed below. The correct answer is in red.)

1.) I see the pain of others. (8 votes - 38%)
2.) I must travel the world. (1 vote - 1%)
3.) I am the answer. (11 votes - 53%)
4.) I love woman. (1 vote - 4%)

A Closer Look at Rosie's Memory

2008-01-31T21:49:00.002-06:00

Well, to begin with…Rosie O'Donnell is nothing if not the quintessential queen of direct speak. She zeroes in quickly on what she believes is right or wrong with whatever she is focused on – and always with such candor and passion that even if you can’t “buy” what she’s selling or smearing, the energy of her argument is undeniable. Really owning a point of view must be her strong suit… or is it?

Likewise, Rosie is adept at romanticizing life….including placing various people, such as her mother or Barbra Streisand or Tom Cruise, in the highest seats of honor. Her often elaborate and spontaneous endorsements are legendary, as is her ability to recite complex musical lyrics and obscure dialogue, apparently without rehearsal, though always with perfect recall.

And when Rosie is on top of her comedic game, she can be “rather entertaining,” as she likes to say about others. If all else fails, she can also provoke people – most marketably, Donald Trump, who joined her in such a vitriolic throw-down that her dramatic departure from The View seemed tedious by comparison.

As is said about some people, Rosie can be a force of nature – a force often turned on herself.

In Rosie’s memory, we are privy to the frustration and anger of a grieving kid who has just lost her mother to breast cancer four days prior and who is hurriedly trying to find the bike of her choice for her eleventh birthday present. When she sees her dad begin to sweat, we know a favorite bike will not be found…and in an absurd way, thank goodness!

Athough nothing is normal about losing your mother at age eleven, it is simply too much to lose your mother and your sense of self all in the same week. Not finding the bike she wants ("by eleven I was used to that") guarantees that at least something in Rosie's life remains strangely constant...at least for now.

And at the bike shop, Rosie does what many kids do when rushed by an impatient parent: She settles. She picks something rather than go home empty-handed. Of course, ultimately, no one ever feels good or right about settling, seeing that settling is a contradiction and therefore, even more unsettling later on. Nevertheless, Rosie settles (#2).

So yes, Rosie is heard (#4). In her memory about the bike, her dad hears the request to ride the new bike home and answers no; however, Rosie imagines her mother saying yes, a romantic notion that compounds Rosie's indignation about his refusal to allow it. Rosie’s awareness of his denial is fundamental to her maintaining a generous sense of righteous indignation…the same indignation we now feel in every sentence of her memory.

But there’s more.

Turns out the banana bike is so bad…it injures her! In a theatrical sense, she slips on a banana, and rather than get the laughter of an audience, she gets the gift of an injury, thus opening herself up to a whole new idea about how to get what she really wants. She uses her wound to promote herself as being normal, which paradoxically for Rosie means unique. And evidently, it works so well, she continues practicing the art of self-injury for several breaks to come. In effect, being injured empowers her.*

Rather than real love, Rosie settles for sympathy love. And like a warrior carrying a trophy (wounded hand) in an uplifted arm (healthy hand), Rosie anticipates the admiration of an adoring crowd, even though along the way, she must settle on a neighbor to take her to the doctor.

Rosie also settles for “all kinds of attention” without the gifts. Attention is better than nothing, she might conclude, contradiction or not. Fact is, one is hard pressed to think of Rosie and not think of something that she longs for or feels lonely about. Thus, its not that “pain is a good thing” (#3), it’s that settling allows her to hold on to intense feelings of sadness and longing for as long as she wants to. Although pain comes and goes, the angst involved in settling can last forever.

And as a program note….not settling requires patience, something Rosie did not experience or receive as a child, evidently, and it also involves learning how to delay reactions until intense emotions calm down (plus a variety of other skills). The chance of Rosie not settling is... as Maya Rudolph of “Saturday Night Live” would say... “zero point zero, zero.” Unsettled emotions drive Rosie’s comedy and intense feelings adorn her canvases.

Finally, keep in mind that an early memory is a window into what is happening now, not what seemed to have happened back then. We have only to look at Rosie’s current life and career to see the innumerable parallels. One might ask…how is Rosie settling now?

* A recent example of this empowerment is Rosie’s repeated mention of herself as “Most Annoying Celebrity of 2007” by Parade Magazine. She has even included a video spoof on her website in which several people ask her to go away because she is so annoying. The video is also annoying, but her viewers surely get the point – of yet another contradiction. (Note that to be annoying, she has to be heard.)

"Settling gets me what I want" is the correct answer for the Rosie's worldview. The following is how readers voted (in parentheses): Don't slip on a banana (7%); Settling gets me what I want (23%); Pain is a good thing (15%); I'm never really heard (53%).

Rosie O'Donnell remembers...

2008-01-25T22:16:00.002-06:00

I got the idea by accident, the first time I fell off my bike. The bike was new, a birthday present. My dad took me to pick it out. I wanted a bike like Jackie’s: small, pink, with streamers coming out of the handlebars. They didn’t have any like Jackie’s. I kept looking. My dad started sweating. I had to pick one quickly, before he changed his mind or got fed up, before my already ruined eleventh birthday became a total washout. I chose a burnt-orange banana bike without streamers. It was too big and not at all what I was looking for. By eleven I was used to that.

When Jackie got her new bike, her dad let her ride it home from the fire station. He drove behind her with flashers on all the way up Marie Crescent. I asked if I could ride my bike home like Jackie had. My dad said no. My mother was dead by then. She would have let me ride home, at least from the sump. I was sure.

There was sand in the street, left over from the melted snow. Spring had just arrived. My mom had been buried. I was cruising the neighborhood on my nowhere near perfect bike. I tried to skid, like the cool kids did, and fell off. I landed on my wrist. It hurt, a lot.

I ran, holding my wounded hand in my healthy one. I left my bike in the middle of the street and I ran. Where to run? That was the question. Not many choices: no Mom, Dad at work, a nana who couldn’t see, hear, or drive a car. I ran to a neighbor, Mrs. Nordin. She took me to get an X-ray, then on to Dr. Reichmann’s office, where I got my first cast. I got all kinds of attention. No gifts, though. I expected gifts.

~ Rosie O'Donnell

Celebrity Detox (2007)

Okay, what do you suspect is Rosie’s worldview?

1. Don’t slip on a banana.
2. Settling gets me what I want.
3. Pain is a good thing.
4. I’m never really heard.

After voting for the best worldview, please also consider recommending a good title for this early memory. What would you name this recollection? If you have an idea to share, shoot me an email - or leave a comment after the post. Thank you!

Horse Sense or Horse Poop? A Closer Look at Maureen Dowd's Memory

2008-01-17T19:42:00.003-06:00

To lose something especially loved or valued feels bad, and when it happens at our own hand, we may berate ourselves for being so careless, although eventually we move on.

However, to learn that someone else has damaged, broken, given away, or stolen something of ours we enjoyed owning ….now that is a horse of a different color – that is a disrespect, an exploitation, a betrayal more difficult to side-step...or get over (maybe ever)….especially when the inconsiderate person is our mother and she justifies her actions with a high-minded platitude about not crying over things that can't cry over you.

In “Horse Tale,” little Maureen bounces out of bed one morning to discover that her rocking horse…the horse she loves and rides everyday is missing… and she is quite aware that “Trigger” hasn’t ridden off on his own.

No…turns out her mother has an interesting story to tell about a poor woman and her son walking by and staring longingly at the rocking horse, after which Maureen's mother gives the horse to them, reportedly because she “has a soft spot for children who hurt.” (Translation: other children who hurt…evidently not her child).

Wow….a favorite toy gone in an instant?! Just like that? Do we even buy this story? Might we wonder how passers-by (i.e., a “poor” woman and her “little" boy) were able to physically take possession of this beloved rocking horse?

The red rocking horse from my childhood dominated a certain space in the room I shared with my sisters – and moving it from one spot to another was really hard to do. The horse was unwieldy and not easy to pick up, let alone carry. Thus, I am curious how a “poor woman with a small child” walking by would even be able to haul off a rocking horse without a car or a truck?!

In fact, the mother’s story brings to mind the inclination of parents to sometimes fabricate pleasant stories to tell their children when the truth is not so redeeming. It goes like this… Johnny realizes the cat is missing; Mom suggests it probably ran away…but truth be told, Dad took it to the vet and said “Find a good home for this irritating cat.”

So, we are left to wonder… what did happen to that irritating rocking horse named Trigger?

Regardless, the mother in this incident sets up her child to experience being betrayed. It didn’t matter what her child wanted…the mother wanted to feel good about giving the horse away – or maybe getting rid of it. Either way, the child’s feelings were not considered.

Notice there is not one mention of a verbal apology either. Sure, Trigger comes back years later – but returning Trigger years later is about as helpful as returning a size 4 pair of shoes to a now grown woman who wears a size 9! What’s the point? Again, the point is to make the giver feel better – not the person whose possessions have been given away at an age-inappropriate time. No matter how we slice this pie, it’s still horse poop.

If fact, Maureen had it right all those years. She kept reminding her mother (for 16 years) that she felt betrayed, even though her mother, evidently, never heard her. (How interesting that Maureen is a writer and not one who speaks for a living.)

And here is where it gets a little stickier for Maureen. In order to feel better about her mother - now that Maureen is an adult, she makes the self-preserving decision to move over to the dark side.

In other words, to regain some sort of control, Maureen makes her mother right! Suddenly, her mother’s favorite line… “Don’t cry over things that can’t cry over you”... starts making horse sense to the maturing daughter. But think about it: How is a person’s life better to follow this inane dictate? Don’t cry because you’ve lost your dog? Your tooth? Your favorite piggy bank full of money? Your health? We can all see that the mother’s reasoning is a little crazy.

Even so, Maureen is able to regain control by surrendering her better judgment to martyrdom. Letting her mother be right feels better – quiets Maureen’s emotions and allows her to feel in control again.

But by making her mother right, Maureen must now say to herself, “Shame on you for worrying about that little horse! For goodness sake…quit crying over things that can’t cry over you! Your mother lost her father at age 12, for Lord’s sake, and you don’t see her crying over everything, do you?” And on and on and on.

Maureen adopts her mother’s high-minded frame of reference and thereby concedes…I was so stupid to care about that silly rocking horse.

At last…relief! Once she takes the position of sitting in judgment of herself, the hurt goes away. She feels better about her mother, and better yet, she is now in control of her own feelings.

And still today, we have only to read Maureen Dowd’s column to see how ably she sits in judgment of everyone. For Maureen Dowd, the pontificating moral high road feels good – and it also earns her a respectable living. And guess what? ….To maintain her worldview of I sit in judgment, she has only to remember a favorite little horse named Trigger.

I ask you….what childhood recollection triggers your worldview?

Horse Tale by Maureen Dowd

2008-01-13T07:46:00.003-06:00

When I was little, I got one of those wooden horses that bounced on springs for Christmas. I loved him and rode him every day.

One morning, I came down to the porch and the horse was gone. My mom explained that a poor woman and her son had walked by, and the little boy had stopped and stared longingly at the horse.

My mom’s world was turned upside down when she lost the father she adored at 12, so she had a soft spot for children who hurt. On a police widow’s pension, she was always mailing a few dollars off to St. Jude’s or to children she had read about who were hungry or needed an operation.

When she told me that she had given my horse to another child — a stranger — I was crushed. Whenever we fought for the next 16 years, I reminded her of her perfidy.

On my 21st birthday, I came home to find a bouncing horse with a handwritten sign in its mouth. “Hi. I’m back!” It was signed: “Trigger.”

I brought the horse of a different era to live with me, as a rebuke about how long it took me to appreciate one of my mom’s favorite sayings: “Don’t cry over things that can’t cry over you.”

Her lesson was lovely: that materialism and narcissism can only smother life — and Christmas — if you let them.

In a piece reprinted in the Kennedy anthology, Henry van Dyke writes: “Are you willing ... to own, that probably the only good reason for your existence is not what you are going to get out of life, but what you are going to give to life; to close your book of complaints against the management of the universe and look around you for a place where you can sow a few seeds of happiness ... to make a grave for your ugly thoughts and a garden for your kindly feelings ...? Then you can keep Christmas.”
~Maureen Dowd/ Dec. 26, 2007

Okay readers...time to consider which of 4 worldviews fits best. Your choices are the following...and can also be found in a poll to the right. (Note - After the poll closed, the votes were included below in percentages. Thank you for voting!)
1.Honor your mother. (0%)
2.I sit in judgment. (55%)
3.Don't bet on a wooden horse. (22%)
4.I deserve too much. (22%)

Rosemary on the Rocks

2008-01-09T10:19:00.003-06:00

A careful reading of Rosemary’s two early memories (Birthday Boomerang and The Ride) tells us, among other things, that Rosemary wants to make sure, in present time, to avoid fearful and suffocating experiences and feeling of emptiness. By recalling on a deep level that my senses get me in trouble, Rosemary reminds herself what happens when she becomes overly excited and carried away (literally!).

Let’s take a closer look at “The Ride.”

In “The Ride,” we find Rosemary visually attracted to pretty rocks in her parents’ driveway. It’s no accident that Rosemary is drawn to a pink rock “to keep for Pawpaw” – pink representing the female gender – as she prepares herself to be presented to her father’s father. And once again, Daddy is central to the action.

Recall that in Birthday Boomerang, it is Daddy who brings home a lavish cake to surprise his wife on her birthday. To be sure, when Daddy’s around, excitement happens! Rosemary can hear it, smell it, and feel it, and today, she and Daddy are about to embark on a thrilling ride to Pawpaw’s house.

Everything about the experience is stimulating…the roar of the three-wheeler engine, the smell of the exhaust, the presence of her father, the strength of his grip as he places her up on the bike and then holds her tight for the trip to Pawpaw’s house, and the anticipation of giving Pawpaw his present: “herself,” and a pretty pink rock. Even with wind stinging her eyes, Rosemary notes only the remedy. “…so I keep [my eyes] closed,” she writes. In effect, the wind may be strong, but it’s nothing compared to the thrill I feel when riding safe in Daddy’s arms.

And with eyes closed (literally and figuratively), Rosemary focuses on the excitement of the adventure…until suddenly everything changes.

The road turns treacherous. Gravel, once considered pretty, now becomes a perilous surface under a speeding three-wheeler. Rosemary hears and feels the crunch of the rocks as she is turned upside down and finds herself lost in darkness. Now that previously exhilarating engine feels much too close and suffocating – probably holding Rosemary confined against the road. Daddy has disappeared, and along with him…the illusion of safety…and Rosemary's freedom.

Wow – what a big and powerful reminder to pay better attention, to observe before jumping in, to think and figure things out before saying yes, and to set limits and maintain privacy!

And if she doesn’t? Well, then it is Rosemary on the rocks…feeling inadequate and unprotected from situations and circumstances that somehow become too close and suffocating. Perhaps it’s better to observe more closely, calm down the excitement, and approach life from a detached point of view? Or is it?

Rock On... Rosemary!

2008-01-04T12:05:00.003-06:00

Check out a second early memory written by Rosemary. In the poll to the right, select her worldview. (note - the poll has now been taken down...readers voted and the results are right here)

#1 - My senses get me in trouble (66%)

#2 - Men can't be trusted. (0%)

#3 - Enthusiasm is dangerous (22%)

#4 - Trouble follows me (11%)

Read "Rosemary on the Rocks" to learn the correct answer.

The Ride

“The pink one is pretty,” I think to myself. “I’ll keep this one for Pawpaw.”

Daddy is taking me on his three-wheeler to see Pawpaw, and I am gathering small rocks from our gravel driveway, picking out the ones I like the most.

I hear the roar of the three-wheeler engine, and I feel excited. I smell the exhaust from the engine – it smells like Daddy when he comes in from working on the farm.

Daddy scoops me up and sits me on the bike in front of him, holding me tight. I am five years old. We speed down the highway, onto the gravel road toward Pawpaw’s house. We are going fast, and the wind is hard on my face. The wind stings my eyes, so I keep them closed.

Then I hear gravel crunch under the wheels of the bike. I am falling. I can’t feel Daddy’s arms around me anymore. It’s hot and dark, and the smell of the engine is close and very strong.

“Daddy, where are you?” I am scared.

Rosemary!! Come to Your Senses!!

2007-12-28T15:30:00.003-06:00

From the gazillions of moments comprising Rosemary’s childhood, she particularly remembers an incident occurring on her mother’s birthday. What is intriguing about Rosemary’s early memory are the many pleasing visual, kinesthetic, olfactory, auditory, and gustatory references throughout!

Rosemary recalls watching her mother put on make-up; including the same frosty blue eye shadow that Rosemary once wore for a dance recital (…an event during which Rosemary most certainly received special attention).

Rosemary also mentions the cool feel of her mother’s blue and green flowered bedspread on her skin...and recalls looking forward to eating birthday cake. For her, as for most children, the sight, smell, and taste of icing, accompanied by the opening of gifts, is la pièce de résistance!

When Rosemary’s father appears at the back door with a fancy cake covered in red roses, he tells Rosemary (speaking in hushed tones and perhaps leaning down to get close to her – very pleasing to a child!), “Don’t tell Mom . . . It’s a surprise.”

As luck would have it, however, just as Rosemary returns to the bedroom, she sees her mother applying color (like icing!) to her lips. Without realizing it, Rosemary becomes so swept up in the visual (and more) that she is unable to quell her excitement! As if in answer to the question: What will give me the greatest mileage in terms of getting attention (keeping the secret OR giving it up?), Rosemary gives it up!

“Before I can stop myself,” she writes, “I blurt out […the surprise].”

All in all, Rosemary’s attention is on attention. She not only attends to and enjoys her environment; she also seeks attention and pleasure for herself. Although we all seek attention and pleasure, children do so with the least amount of guile and sophistication; they just go for it! By blurting out her dad’s surprise, Rosemary gains momentary special importance for herself and also gets to enjoy that first look of genuine delight on her mother’s face – the look her father was hoping to score!

Rosemary then pays for her indiscretion when she has to witness the look of disappointment on her father’s face (…and, we might guess, has to listen to his reprimand or maybe hear him complain that she spoiled the surprise… perhaps in the guise of teasing).

As a result, Birthday Boomerang is Rosemary’s internal warning not to get so caught up in life that she loses control of her boundaries, her privacy, and her space. When that happens, “I know I am in big trouble.” She might as well be saying, “My senses get me in trouble,” so I’d better withdraw a bit, conserve my energy, and reduce intrusions and demands… lest I be found reckless.

In terms of the poll, “Men can’t be pleased” is the easiest choice to eliminate. As for “Trouble follows me,” the memory in its entirety does not support this choice either; otherwise Rosemary might have mentioned a mishap at the dance recital, for example. And finally, “Enthusiasm is dangerous” does not work…partially for the reason Jenny gives in the comments associated with another post entitled “I remember one time….” As Jenny points out, if “Enthusiasm is dangerous” were the best choice, it would actually have to read “Enthusiasm could be dangerous.”

But more to the point, what drives or feeds Rosemary’s enthusiasm? By reminding herself on a deep level that “My senses get me in trouble,” Rosemary attends to the careful management of sensory input, in the hope of avoiding any “big trouble.”

(For those who wish to review Rosemary's memory, entitled Birthday Boomerang, I am including it right below....)

Birthday Boomerang

It’s Mom’s birthday, August 12th. I am excited, because I will get to eat birthday cake!

I’m with Mom in her bedroom. She is putting on her makeup… bright blue frosty eye shadow, the same color she put on me for my dance recital in May. I lie on her bed and watch. The bedspread is in blues and greens with big flowers. It feels cool on my bare arms and legs.

I hear Daddy come in the back door. I get up and run to the kitchen. He has a white box in his hands that he places on the table. He opens up the box, and I peer inside…Mom’s birthday cake! Creamy white icing with big red roses and fancy writing.

He whispers, “Don’t tell Mom…. It’s a surprise.” I nod in agreement, but I’m not really listening.

I run to Mom’s bedroom, and she is putting on her lipstick. Before I can stop myself, I blurt out, “Daddy has a surprise for you! It’s a cake!” Daddy walks in as I am speaking – disappointment on his face, his brow furrowed. I know I am in big trouble.

~Rosemary
1999

What is Rosemary's worldview?

1. My senses get me in trouble.

2. Men can't be pleased.

3. Enthusiasm in dangerous.

4. Trouble follows me.

Thank you for voting!

2007-12-26T20:17:00.001-06:00

I am really excited about Thinkwriter, and I appreciate every single vote…every single bit of interest. Thank you for reading and participating.

I am about to post the evaluation of Rosemary’s memory, in terms of what it tells us about her worldview. I want to apologize up front for the length of the post coming up – seems a bit long, though it could have been even longer!

Also coming soon is another memory “Rosemary” verbally shared with me – one that I recently asked her to put in Thinkwriting style. She sent it to me yesterday....so please stay tuned.

I remember one time...

2007-12-23T15:36:00.004-06:00

Joyful holiday memories are fun to share with family members. Don’t let this holiday season pass without sharing a favorite holiday memory or two with one or more family members. Select a specific moment or story to tell... one that can begin with the words, "I remember one time…;" or "Once when I was___years old, (…and then share your memory)." Keep it fairly brief; make it real; and enjoy telling it!

Sharing an authentic piece of personal history with those you love is a fantastic gift, and better yet, it opens the door for others to share their best memories with you. It’s also interesting to hear a story you may actually remember, but from someone else’s point of view. Pretty soon you’ll all know each other even better than before ….and you’ll have something extraordinary to take home with you when the party’s over. Enjoy!