Fire Tales by John Mitchell

So, you do remember the once-upon-a-time-attorney-general John Mitchell . . . yes?

As Richard Nixon’s two-time campaign manager and attorney general from 1969 to 1972, John Newton Mitchell distinguished himself as not only the central figure in the rise and fall of President Richard M. Nixon…but also as the highest ranking American official ever convicted and imprisoned on criminal charges.

On February 21, 1975, Mitchell was convicted of conspiracy, obstruction of justice, and perjury for his role in the Watergate break-in and cover-up and sentenced to two and a half to eight years in prison. He subsequently served 19 months at the minimum security prison at Maxwell Air Force base in Montgomery, Alabama.

But we don’t need the Watergate scandal to confirm Mitchell’s obvious connivery; we have only to peruse his completely transparent early memories to establish that he had a clear preference for the dark side.

Even a quick reading of Mitchell’s early memories reveals their obvious and telling commonalities. In the first memory, Mitchell is fire’s consort; and in the second, fire’s creator; thus, both involve partnership with fire . . . the devil’s only friend. Both memories also suggest Mitchell's real joy in doing what he “shouldn’t” (throw school books in the fire and light sparklers before nightfall), and both suggest an absence of any real consequence to him for doing wrong.

But even more illuminating is Mitchell’s joy in telling the two memories. He remains prideful, boastful, and abundantly pleased throughout his delivery. With unabashed laughter and enjoyment, he represents himself as oh-so-clever to be getting-one-over on the “authority” – including the authority of "society," as represented by the old wooden school in the first memory, and the the authority of the "family," as represented by the family home in the second memory.

And the underlying message? I don’t like to have to submit to authority. Therefore, by eradicating the authority (school), I take control as the authority. I also don’t like to follow the rules (imposed by family); therefore, I do what I want when I want to do it, regardless the consequences. And, by the way, I seek a dark place to have my way; I go down under to have my fun.

Keep in mind, of course, Mitchell is telling these memories when he is an adult. He is speaking about himself as he is now and going forward. Without realizing it, he is telling us how he remembers his future…how he views his world. Remarkably, his life story validates the truth of his worldview: I am the devil’s advocate.

Of course, the real boomerang in Mitchell’s fire tales is that he apparently fabricated some or all of each memory. He could have put himself in any light, even a positive one; yet he chose to frame himself as a fire encourager and a fire starter. In truth, if Nixon were the devil, then Mitchell did Nixon’s bidding...(and was aptly rewarded by fire).

Beware the language in the following audio, but do listen for Nixon's comments about John Mitchell (boo yeow!).